In the memo from the vice president of Butler Manufacturing, It is stated that reducing the work shift by one hour they can improve Butler Manufacturing’s safety record. They concluded this on the basis of Panoply Industries records and government study reports. In order to effectively evaluate this recommendation, It is crucial to address three key questions beforehand.
Firstly, Are Panoply Industries comparable with Butler Manufacturing? In other words, Can we relate the accidents occurring in Panoply industries with Butler Manufacturing? Of course not! The reasons for accidents may vary company to company. Also, according to memo, there is mentioned that 30 percent more on-the-job accidents were reported in Butler Manufacturing than Panoply Industries and we cannot compare the case where the numerical value could be vast difference and this percentage is not giving us actual numerical data. So In this way the given argument seems weak.
Secondly, Are fatigue and sleep deprivation only the reasons behind those accident? It is totally unjustified if we only consider these two reasons. There could be more than that. It could be unavailability of safety equipment, conflict between workers, negligence, mismanagement and many more. These could be more serious and severe reasons. Mainly, Accidents are more vulnerable to unavailability of safety equipment and mismanagements, but the aforementioned arguments totally ignored these reasons. So, depending only on two reasons and concluding on that basis is totally unwarranted.
And Lastly, Can we fully trust the reported survey? There are two survey mentioned on the argument. First, reports on accident rate and second Government study report. There could be more accidents rate at Panoply Industries which were not included or what if for better result Panoply industries could lie on their report. Is that report trustworthy? And We cannot solely depend on the study report provided by government, It can be argued that, study report made by government is not equally applicable to Butler Manufacturer. May be this study report were from different location and different company which could be true for this one. So depending on irrelevant report also make this argument indefensible.
In conclusion, the current argument suffers from significant flaws primarily because it relies on a number of unjustified assumptions. However, if the author can address the aforementioned three questions and present additional evidence( such as systematic and comprehensive research study) it will be possible to reduce work shift by one hour to improve the accident rate.
- It is possible to pass laws that control or place limits on people s behavior but legislation cannot reform human nature Laws cannot change what is in people s hearts and minds 50
- The following appeared in a memo from the Board of Directors of Butler Manufacturing quot During the past year workers at Butler Manufacturing reported 30 percent more on the job accidents than workers at nearby Panoply Industries where the work shifts 63
- From a letter to the editor of a city newspaper One recent research study has indicated that many adolescents need more sleep than they are getting and another study has shown that many high school students in our city are actually dissatisfied with th 53
- The following was written as a part of an application for a small business loan by a group of developers in the city of Monroe A jazz music club in Monroe would be a tremendously profitable enterprise Currently the nearest jazz club is 65 miles away 71
- To be an effective leader a public official must maintain the highest ethical and moral standards 50
e-rater score report
The third argument is not correct
=====================
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 26 15
No. of Words: 404 350
No. of Characters: 2177 1500
No. of Different Words: 203 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.483 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.389 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.984 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 169 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 129 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 89 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 69 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.538 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.997 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.654 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.269 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.269 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.117 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
In the memo from the vice president of B...
^^^^
Line 3, column 69, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this accident' or 'those accidents'?
Suggestion: this accident; those accidents
...eep deprivation only the reasons behind those accident? It is totally unjustified if we only c...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 66, Rule ID: THERE_RE_MANY[3]
Message: Possible agreement error. Did you mean 'surveys'?
Suggestion: surveys
...rust the reported survey? There are two survey mentioned on the argument. First, repor...
^^^^^^
Line 4, column 66, Rule ID: CD_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun 'survey' seems to be countable, so consider using: 'surveys'.
Suggestion: surveys
...rust the reported survey? There are two survey mentioned on the argument. First, repor...
^^^^^^
Line 4, column 533, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[8]
Message: The proper name in singular (May) must be used with a third-person verb: 'is'.
Suggestion: is
... applicable to Butler Manufacturer. May be this study report were from different l...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, however, if, lastly, may, second, secondly, so, in conclusion, of course, such as, in other words
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 24.0 19.6327345309 122% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 17.0 12.9520958084 131% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 11.1786427146 143% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 13.6137724551 66% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 33.0 28.8173652695 115% => OK
Preposition: 43.0 55.5748502994 77% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 16.3942115768 98% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2234.0 2260.96107784 99% => OK
No of words: 404.0 441.139720559 92% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.5297029703 5.12650576532 108% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.48327461151 4.56307096286 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.09622498471 2.78398813304 111% => OK
Unique words: 206.0 204.123752495 101% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.509900990099 0.468620217663 109% => OK
syllable_count: 717.3 705.55239521 102% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.8 1.59920159681 113% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 2.0 8.76447105788 23% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.22255489022 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 19.7664670659 126% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 22.8473053892 70% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 63.1261087031 57.8364921388 109% => OK
Chars per sentence: 89.36 119.503703932 75% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.16 23.324526521 69% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.96 5.70786347227 87% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.25449101796 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 12.0 6.88822355289 174% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.255253158307 0.218282227539 117% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0705503205794 0.0743258471296 95% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0770976828157 0.0701772020484 110% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.142610524543 0.128457276422 111% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.089592336949 0.0628817314937 142% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.7 14.3799401198 88% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 38.31 48.3550499002 79% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.197005988 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.5 12.5979740519 115% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.49 8.32208582834 102% => OK
difficult_words: 104.0 98.500998004 106% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 12.3882235529 57% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 8.4 11.1389221557 75% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 75.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.5 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.