The following appeared in a memo from the vice president of marketing at Dura-Sock, Inc.
"A recent study of our customers suggests that our company is wasting the money it spends on its patented Endure manufacturing process, which ensures that our socks are strong enough to last for two years. We have always advertised our use of the Endure process, but the new study shows that despite our socks' durability, our average customer actually purchases new Dura-Socks every three months. Furthermore, our customers surveyed in our largest market, northeastern United States cities, say that they most value Dura-Socks' stylish appearance and availability in many colors. These findings suggest that we can increase our profits by discontinuing use of the Endure manufacturing process."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The vice president of marketing at Dura-Socks, Inc. suggests discontinuing usage of its patented Endure manufacturing process in order to increase its proceeds. This conclusion is supported by some evidences and results of recent survey which should be evaluated in order to estimate soundness of the vice president's statement.
First evidence which is given to us is that company's average customer buys new socks each three months, therefore author avers that it is unnecessarily to adhere to the more expensive patented process which guarantees that a pair of Dura-Socks will serve at least two years. Although, at the first glaze, the vice president point of view seems to be reasonable, the possibility exists that an average buyer is a long-term one. In other words, a person may use socks of this corporation for years and therefore each new pair will substitute socks which were bought two years ago. Moreover, if a slander about discontinuing of the usage of the Dura-socks technology has become widespread, hardened buyers probably decide to create a storage of loved socks in order to ensure their availability, in case, the corporation accepts the vice president' proposal.
The second evidence which stated in the argument is that a survey which was carried out in the largest northeastern United States cities points out that customers like sock's stylish appearance and the fact that they are produced in many colors. From author's prospect, that means that Dura-Socks may stop using its unique technology. This proposal is flowed due to the fact that clients' appreciation of such sock's characteristics as available colors and style does not rule out the admiration of their durability by clients. For instance, the surveyed public may have such a deep association between the durability and the brand that accept this socks qualities as unchangeable and everlasting. Moreover, the questions which were asked may be created in such a way that people's answers were steered from mentioned such sock's features as durability.
Finally, the writer of the argument asserts that in order to increase corporation’s profit, it should stop using the unique technology. However, in case, the evidence given to us was interpreted by the author incorrectly, the result of implementation of the policy may be devastating for corporation’s future. For instance, if buyers of Dura-Socks indeed associate the durability with the company’s product, the discontinuing of the usage of the technology will undermine loyalty of the clients and, perhaps, lead to decrease company’s proceeds.
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- Essay topics: TPO-01 - Integrated Writing Task 90
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argument 1 -- not exactly. Look: 'average customer actually purchases new Dura-Socks every three months'.
suggested:
This does not take into account other reasons for which the customer purchases the socks. In economics, tastes and preferences are huge determinates of demand in the market system. The customers could be spending money on new socks simply for the sake of variety and still use their old socks that they had purchased during the previous visit.
or maybe costumes buy socks for their family members or relatives.
argument 2 -- need more: Geographical factors could greatly be a reason for why consumers in the northeast prefer style and variability. For instance, in the midwestern United States, there could be a greater population that performs hard labor and treks many miles as part of their daily responsibilities. Therefore, if one were to survey the consumers in other parts of the nation, the result may be different.
argument 3 -- OK
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flaws:
Need a conclusion paragraph.
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Attribute Value Ideal
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Category: Good Excellent
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No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
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Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.497 4.7
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Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.361 0.35
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Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.079 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5