As the memorandum provided by the owner of Movies galore, to reverse the recent decline in profit he suggests that certain changes in another store might result in the same output as before. The owner of the store claims the conclusion without exhaustive research on different stores. The owner provides two examples of reversing the profit: raising the rental price, and decreasing operating expenses by closing at 6:00 p.m rather than 9:00 p.m. In such an instant, the changes should be initiated as per the research on different stores.
The owner might be wrong as he wants to remove certain old movies, there are different people with disparate choices. Simply we cannot remove movies without knowing people's desires. There are different movies with a streak of series. There might be a new viewer of the newly released last part of the series; however, he wishes to watch previous parts of the movie. Thus, removing the old movies from the sack might not be a better option to reverse the profit. As stated by the owner “it is one of the reputed shops in the area” thus, removing old movies might degrade the name of the shop. The owner should research removing certain categories of movies that are less demanded in the market.
There is no proper research for the different shops as there might be different peak times in different stores. The previous change of time for one store might not be a good idea for another. The exhaustive and lucid research should be done based on the peak hour and movies to add. What if the peak hour of the store is about 6:00 p.m to 9:00 p.m? This might result in declining the profit more harshly. Thus, one can’t claim the conclusion without incomplete research. There might be other choices to reverse the profit such as finding out the peak hour and least sell hours. The store can be closed except peak hours for a certain time. Considering the reputation, the store can be close for few hours.
As the analysis might be true in some way. There is no proper exhaustive research, thus, it might be more applicable if the research holds some facts. Thus, without a proper premise, the conclusion can’t be claimed. This might degrade the reputation of the company.
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e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 2 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 392 350
No. of Characters: 1777 1500
No. of Different Words: 167 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.45 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.533 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.325 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 130 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 80 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 48 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 26 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.818 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.978 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.364 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.331 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.376 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.133 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 2 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 706, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “As” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
..., the store can be close for few hours. As the analysis might be true in some way....
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
however, if, so, thus, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.6327345309 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 20.0 12.9520958084 154% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 11.1786427146 36% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 2.0 13.6137724551 15% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 10.0 28.8173652695 35% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 55.5748502994 86% => OK
Nominalization: 2.0 16.3942115768 12% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1835.0 2260.96107784 81% => OK
No of words: 385.0 441.139720559 87% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.76623376623 5.12650576532 93% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.4296068528 4.56307096286 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.32884918777 2.78398813304 84% => OK
Unique words: 173.0 204.123752495 85% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.449350649351 0.468620217663 96% => OK
syllable_count: 550.8 705.55239521 78% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.59920159681 88% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.76447105788 114% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 19.7664670659 111% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 22.8473053892 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 47.7403445303 57.8364921388 83% => OK
Chars per sentence: 83.4090909091 119.503703932 70% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.5 23.324526521 75% => OK
Discourse Markers: 1.36363636364 5.70786347227 24% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 5.15768463074 78% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.191679915377 0.218282227539 88% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0681961181308 0.0743258471296 92% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0677206228895 0.0701772020484 96% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.126273459196 0.128457276422 98% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0908017218697 0.0628817314937 144% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.8 14.3799401198 68% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 71.14 48.3550499002 147% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.6 12.197005988 62% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.09 12.5979740519 80% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.51 8.32208582834 90% => OK
difficult_words: 74.0 98.500998004 75% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 12.3882235529 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 11.1389221557 79% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.9071856287 67% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.