In the memo, the vice president of Health Naturally, which is a chain of stores selling healthy foods and other health-related products, concludes that the next store should be built in Plainsville since the merchant of Plansville has reported that the sale of running shoes and exercise equipment is so high in this region. Moreover, the local health club in Plainville has more members than ever, and also, the weight-training and aerobic classes are always full. Nevertheless, while the conclusion drawn by the author might hold water, it rests on several unfounded assumptions that, if not substantiated, dramatically weaken the persuasiveness of the argument. Thus, the author must provide the following three pieces of evidence.
First of all, the vice president did not provide any evidence regarding the rate of healthy-food consumption in this area. The Plansville dwellers might buy exercise equipment and running shoes, but most of them might not be interested in eating healthy food. They may both eat junky food and exercise since they see exercise as a fun activity. If this scenario has merit, the author's assertion that the high rate of buying running shoes or other exercise equipment indicates Plansville's people's tendency toward eating healthy food is significantly hampered.
Secondly, if the number of people cares about their health condition are high in Plansville, there might be plenty of stores that offer healthy food and other health-related stuff. The vice president did not provide any evidence about the number of potential rivals. It is possible that people might prefer to keep buying from local stores rather than a new store. If the number of competitors is high, it is unlikely that Health Naturally could find a vacant place in this demanding market. The argument does not hold water if the above is true.
Finally, it seems rational that the vice president considers the ratio of people who exercise to all people in Plainville. It is possible that this ratio is so low that there is a few gym clubs or aerobic classes in this area. This might explain why these classes are always full. The vice president should provide evidence on the number of people who are potential buyers of healthy stuff and the number of gym clubs. If it is true that a few numbers of people do exercise in this area and aerobic classes and gym clubs are always full because of their low number in Plansville, the credibility of the writer's claim decreases significantly.
To recapitulate, it is possible that establishing a new store in Plainville would provide Health Naturally chain stores with a significant profit since the people in this region take care of their physical health. Nonetheless, as it stands now, the argument relies on three groundless assumptions that render its conclusion unpersuasive at best and specious at worst. Therefore, the writer must provide additional evidence on three fronts: the rate of healthy-food consumption in Plansville, the potential competitors that may outcompete this store, and the ratio of the number of healthcare people to total people as well as the number of gym clubs and aerobic classes in this region.
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Essay evaluations by e-grader
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 378, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...tivity. If this scenario has merit, the authors assertion that the high rate of buying ...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, if, may, moreover, nevertheless, nonetheless, regarding, second, secondly, so, therefore, thus, well, while, as well as, first of all, it is true
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.6327345309 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 11.1786427146 143% => OK
Relative clauses : 17.0 13.6137724551 125% => OK
Pronoun: 41.0 28.8173652695 142% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 63.0 55.5748502994 113% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 16.3942115768 91% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2665.0 2260.96107784 118% => OK
No of words: 520.0 441.139720559 118% => OK
Chars per words: 5.125 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.77530192783 4.56307096286 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.81424354241 2.78398813304 101% => OK
Unique words: 227.0 204.123752495 111% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.436538461538 0.468620217663 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 810.9 705.55239521 115% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 4.96107784431 161% => OK
Article: 14.0 8.76447105788 160% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 2.70958083832 258% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 74.288308868 57.8364921388 128% => OK
Chars per sentence: 126.904761905 119.503703932 106% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.7619047619 23.324526521 106% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.19047619048 5.70786347227 143% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.208133034404 0.218282227539 95% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0672828958212 0.0743258471296 91% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0836639572492 0.0701772020484 119% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.14053922666 0.128457276422 109% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0824737078067 0.0628817314937 131% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.1 14.3799401198 105% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 48.3550499002 97% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.197005988 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.77 12.5979740519 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.8 8.32208582834 94% => OK
difficult_words: 98.0 98.500998004 99% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 19.0 12.3882235529 153% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 378, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...tivity. If this scenario has merit, the authors assertion that the high rate of buying ...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, if, may, moreover, nevertheless, nonetheless, regarding, second, secondly, so, therefore, thus, well, while, as well as, first of all, it is true
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.6327345309 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 11.1786427146 143% => OK
Relative clauses : 17.0 13.6137724551 125% => OK
Pronoun: 41.0 28.8173652695 142% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 63.0 55.5748502994 113% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 16.3942115768 91% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2665.0 2260.96107784 118% => OK
No of words: 520.0 441.139720559 118% => OK
Chars per words: 5.125 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.77530192783 4.56307096286 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.81424354241 2.78398813304 101% => OK
Unique words: 227.0 204.123752495 111% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.436538461538 0.468620217663 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 810.9 705.55239521 115% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 4.96107784431 161% => OK
Article: 14.0 8.76447105788 160% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 2.70958083832 258% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 74.288308868 57.8364921388 128% => OK
Chars per sentence: 126.904761905 119.503703932 106% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.7619047619 23.324526521 106% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.19047619048 5.70786347227 143% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.208133034404 0.218282227539 95% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0672828958212 0.0743258471296 91% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0836639572492 0.0701772020484 119% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.14053922666 0.128457276422 109% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0824737078067 0.0628817314937 131% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.1 14.3799401198 105% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 48.3550499002 97% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.197005988 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.77 12.5979740519 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.8 8.32208582834 94% => OK
difficult_words: 98.0 98.500998004 99% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 19.0 12.3882235529 153% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.