The following appeared in a memorandum written by the vice president of Nature's Way, a chain of stores selling health food and other health-related products.
"Previous experience has shown that our stores are most profitable in areas where residents are highly concerned with leading healthy lives. We should therefore build our next new store in Plainsville, which has many such residents. Plainsville merchants report that sales of running shoes and exercise clothing are at all-time highs. The local health club, which nearly closed five years ago due to lack of business, has more members than ever, and the weight training and aerobics classes are always full. We can even anticipate a new generation of customers: Plainsville's schoolchildren are required to participate in a 'fitness for life' program, which emphasizes the benefits of regular exercise at an early age."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on the assumptions and what the implications are if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
The arguments says that vice president of Nature's Way wants to build their next new store as their previous stores get more profit. The argument also said that exercise clothing and shoes demands are always high and the exercise gym is always full. It also draws a conclusion that, school children should participate fitness program at an early age. These assumptions are flawed in different ways.
As the argument do not mention any evidence data it is quite confusing to say that according to previous experience they can obviously get profit in next store. As previous stores are profitable with health conscious buyer it can not be said that next store also will be profitable with such healthy residence. Because as peoples demand changes frequently it will be irrelevant to draw a strong assumption like that.
Secondly, the argument not only draws a conclusion based on ague and ambiguous terms, but also uses data from a limited sample about exercise clothes and shoes. While weight training and aerobics class are always full what about other exercise classes? the argument could not mention any explanation regarding these exercise classes.
However, In the argument Nature's Way has assumed they could have new generation customer. But there might not any guarrenty that the new generation will also lead a good healthy life. They have to know about the health benefit and get knowledge about healthy life style. For this reason, the family of the new generation can help them.
The arguments could be strength if the vice president provided evidence regarding their profit. This could be further strength if he could thought about others profitable things like exercise cloths and shoes. It would have been a better arguments if these information would be depicted and then draw a meaningful conclusion.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 2 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 297 350
No. of Characters: 1494 1500
No. of Different Words: 161 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.151 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.03 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.461 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 105 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 82 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 62 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 34 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.562 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.634 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.625 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.319 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.584 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.088 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 15, Rule ID: AGREEMENT_SENT_START[1]
Message: You should probably use 'say'.
Suggestion: say
The arguments says that vice president of Natures Way want...
^^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “As” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ptions are flawed in different ways. As the argument do not mention any evidenc...
^^
Line 3, column 162, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “As” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...can obviously get profit in next store. As previous stores are profitable with hea...
^^
Line 3, column 312, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Because” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...profitable with such healthy residence. Because as peoples demand changes frequently it...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 254, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: The
...full what about other exercise classes? the argument could not mention any explanat...
^^^
Line 9, column 140, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'could' requires the base form of the verb: 'think'
Suggestion: think
...s could be further strength if he could thought about others profitable things like exe...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 252, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this information' or 'these informations'?
Suggestion: this information; these informations
...t would have been a better arguments if these information would be depicted and then draw a meani...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, regarding, second, secondly, so, then, while
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 19.6327345309 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 12.9520958084 116% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 11.1786427146 89% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 25.0 28.8173652695 87% => OK
Preposition: 24.0 55.5748502994 43% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 17.0 16.3942115768 104% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1530.0 2260.96107784 68% => OK
No of words: 297.0 441.139720559 67% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.15151515152 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.15134772569 4.56307096286 91% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.48914704886 2.78398813304 89% => OK
Unique words: 162.0 204.123752495 79% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.545454545455 0.468620217663 116% => OK
syllable_count: 465.3 705.55239521 66% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 19.7664670659 86% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 22.8473053892 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 30.3840469888 57.8364921388 53% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 90.0 119.503703932 75% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.4705882353 23.324526521 75% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.0 5.70786347227 70% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.25449101796 133% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.147754594992 0.218282227539 68% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0469559939133 0.0743258471296 63% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0689328246443 0.0701772020484 98% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0831998358332 0.128457276422 65% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.056243336336 0.0628817314937 89% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.6 14.3799401198 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 48.3550499002 112% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.29 12.5979740519 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.72 8.32208582834 93% => OK
difficult_words: 61.0 98.500998004 62% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 12.3882235529 61% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 11.1389221557 79% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.9071856287 67% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.