The following is a recommendation from the Board of Directors of Monarch Books.
"We recommend that Monarch Books open a café in its store. Monarch, having been in business at the same location for more than twenty years, has a large customer base because it is known for its wide selection of books on all subjects. Clearly, opening the café would attract more customers. Space could be made for the café by discontinuing the children's book section, which will probably become less popular given that the most recent national census indicated a significant decline in the percentage of the population under age ten. Opening a café will allow Monarch to attract more customers and better compete with Regal Books, which recently opened its own café."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
In order to increase the customer base at Monach Bookstore, the author suggests on the basis of the national census and a competitor's actions to discontinue the children's book section and open a cafe instead. The author's argument is flawed because it rests on unsupported assumptions. The facts presented by the author are not sufficient enough to lead convincingly to the given idea, leaving the argument vulnerable to criticism.
The author has suggested his ideas on the basis of the national census which indicated a significant decline in the percentage of the population under age ten. However, the range of ages covered by the children bookstore is not known and could include children who are a little above the age of ten (11-12). Moreover, even if the population has reduced, the average number of books read by each child could be large and hence the children's book section could be responsible for a large portion of the bookstore's profits. Had the author mentioned an evidence suggesting the decline in the purchase of children's books rather than the census, the argument would have been stronger.
Secondly, the author assumes an analogy between two competitors in a business and uses the cafe opened at Regal Book as a precedent to support his claim. However, the author fails to provide any stats indicating the success of the idea. Even if the idea did work out for Regal books, the reason would be unknown. The barista at the cafe could be really good and hence the customers are attracted to the coffee rather than the books. Hence, to make a decision on the basis of the above-mentioned argument could prove to be fatal. Had the author mentioned some stats depicting an increase in sales of books at Regal Books after the introduction of a cafe and provided reasons for that increase, the argument would have been stronger.
Since the given argument suffers from planning and analogy biases, it is a weak argument. By incorporating the suggestions mentioned above the author could have bolstered his argument.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
argument 1 -- OK
argument 2 -- OK
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flaws:
minimum 3 arguments wanted.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 341 350
No. of Characters: 1663 1500
No. of Different Words: 167 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.297 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.877 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.683 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 115 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 92 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 65 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 37 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.733 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.062 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.467 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.376 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.558 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.084 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 214, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...ok section and open a cafe instead. The authors argument is flawed because it rests on ...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...he argument vulnerable to criticism. The author has suggested his ideas on the b...
^^^
Line 8, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...hor could have bolstered his argument.
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
hence, however, if, moreover, really, second, secondly, so
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 19.6327345309 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 12.9520958084 69% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 3.0 13.6137724551 22% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 6.0 28.8173652695 21% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 55.5748502994 86% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 16.3942115768 91% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1698.0 2260.96107784 75% => OK
No of words: 341.0 441.139720559 77% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.97947214076 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.29722995808 4.56307096286 94% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.71830265787 2.78398813304 98% => OK
Unique words: 168.0 204.123752495 82% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.492668621701 0.468620217663 105% => OK
syllable_count: 538.2 705.55239521 76% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 12.0 8.76447105788 137% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 19.7664670659 76% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 46.8885202724 57.8364921388 81% => OK
Chars per sentence: 113.2 119.503703932 95% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.7333333333 23.324526521 97% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.86666666667 5.70786347227 68% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 5.15768463074 78% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.122019215728 0.218282227539 56% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0447352481732 0.0743258471296 60% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0397990627232 0.0701772020484 57% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0746755702728 0.128457276422 58% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0311689648886 0.0628817314937 50% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.4 14.3799401198 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 48.3550499002 102% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.197005988 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.9 12.5979740519 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.52 8.32208582834 102% => OK
difficult_words: 82.0 98.500998004 83% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 12.3882235529 93% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.