"Over 80 percent of the respondents to a recent survey indicated a desire to reduce theirintake of foods containing fats and cholesterol, and today low-fat products abound in manyfood stores. Since many of the food products currently marketed by Old

Essay topics:

"Over 80 percent of the respondents to a recent survey indicated a desire to reduce their
intake of foods containing fats and cholesterol, and today low-fat products abound in many
food stores. Since many of the food products currently marketed by Old Dairy Industries are
high in fat and cholesterol , the company's sales are likely to diminish greatly and their profits
will no doubt decrease. We therefore advise Old Dairy stockholders to sell their shares and
other investors not to purchase stock in this company."

The author claims that the investors should not buy the shares of Old Dairy Industries because its sale is going to plummet. The premises provided by the author is logically flawed due to many reasons: the size of the survey is not mentioned, no proof is given to prove the high-fat content and a flawed assertion about the decrease in sales is made.
The author claim that over 80% percent of people want a low-fat diet in order to remain salubrious. However, the author does not provide any information about the respondents. It may be possible that the number of respondents is not big, which makes 80% an insignificant figure to affect sales. Moreover, as it is mentioned that these respondents do not want to intake an unhealthy diet, rich in fat and cholesterol, which means they are already shrewd about maintaining their body in good shape. It may be possible that they are not using the Old Dairy Industries product in the first place, which makes their response useless in the survey.
Moreover, the author claims that the company product has high fat and cholesterol content. But, no proof is given in order to substantiate the claim. It may be possible the company is already making healthy products which have low-fat content.
Furthermore, even if the size of the survey is big enough and the Old Dairy products do contain high components of fat and cholesterol, the author wrongly asserts that the sales will decrease. It may be possible that the company will extend its business to other areas where people are not that conscious about fat content or they can start taking orders from faraway places and send their products there in order to make more sales
Finally, the author should provide more information about the respondents, such as numbers, to substantiate his claim. Moreover, the author should quantify the content of fat and cholesterol, so that proportion of unhealthy products can be verified and the author should provide details that the Old Dairy company cannot work outside and if the nearby people would stop to use its product, its sale will decrease.

Votes
Average: 6.6 (1 vote)
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2019-06-24 SHARJEEL 66 view
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...n about the decrease in sales is made. The author claim that over 80% percent of p...
^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, finally, first, furthermore, however, if, may, moreover, so, such as, in the first place

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.6327345309 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 12.9520958084 116% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 11.1786427146 89% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 13.6137724551 118% => OK
Pronoun: 28.0 28.8173652695 97% => OK
Preposition: 36.0 55.5748502994 65% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 16.3942115768 24% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1740.0 2260.96107784 77% => OK
No of words: 355.0 441.139720559 80% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.9014084507 5.12650576532 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.34067318298 4.56307096286 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.55711973459 2.78398813304 92% => OK
Unique words: 163.0 204.123752495 80% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.459154929577 0.468620217663 98% => OK
syllable_count: 527.4 705.55239521 75% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 19.7664670659 66% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 27.0 22.8473053892 118% => OK
Sentence length SD: 87.048717911 57.8364921388 151% => OK
Chars per sentence: 133.846153846 119.503703932 112% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.3076923077 23.324526521 117% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.15384615385 5.70786347227 125% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 8.20758483034 61% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.190215901534 0.218282227539 87% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0841465015577 0.0743258471296 113% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.057009916143 0.0701772020484 81% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.12306730102 0.128457276422 96% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0350995182457 0.0628817314937 56% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.3 14.3799401198 106% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.53 48.3550499002 109% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.6 12.197005988 103% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.44 12.5979740519 91% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.78 8.32208582834 93% => OK
difficult_words: 63.0 98.500998004 64% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 12.3882235529 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 11.1389221557 115% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.