argument:Arctic deer live on islands in Canada's arctic regions. They search for food by moving over ice from island to island during the course of the year. Their habitat is limited to areas warm enough to sustain the plants on which they feed and cold enough, at least some of the year, for the ice to cover the sea separating the islands, allowing the deer to travel over it. Unfortunately, according to reports from local hunters, the deer populations are declining. Since these reports coincide with recent global warming trends that have caused the sea ice to melt, we can conclude that the purported decline in deer populations is the result of the deer's being unable to follow their age-old migration patterns across the frozen sea.
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The author argues that because of the recent global warming trend, the deer population are declining. He cites some evidence to support it. Although these evidences appear to bolster the author's argument, a meticulous analysis will show otherwise.So he needs to cite some specific evidences to make the argument more sound. First,an authentic investigation report about the number of arctic deer from ecologists is necessary.Second, we need to know the time of the global warming lasting. Third, about the rate of the plants that arctic deer feed on.
First, it's necessary for the author to provide an authentic report to show whether the number of arctic deer is decline or not. If the answer is yes, it would be worth to study the reasons of it later,or the argument will lose its value,for it's likely that the local hunters reduce the conclusion only depended on their own normal experiences without considering other factors that may also lead to the same situation. The hunters,for instance, may see fewer deer in certain periods when the deer precisely to go to other islands which does not indicate the decrease of the deer populations. For that matter, it's also possible that the deer find ways to avoid to be hunted by hunters.
Second,the author needs to clarify the time of the global warming lasting.This evidence, again, can go either direction. If the global warming is so serious and last for a long period of time like several years that makes the whole ice melt in the regions where the deer search for food.Thus,the deer would be limited in a solely island during these long period of time,which,then,may lead to the reduction of the deer populatons regarding of the possibility of their food shortage. In the case, it will bolster the argument. However, if the global warming only lasting for several months in a year,the deer are able to move over ice in other months when the water is frozen. Thus, they still be able to follow their age-old migration patterns.
Third,the author needs to cite the evidence about the growth rate of the plant on which they feed, which will decide to some extent whether the deer have the plenty food or not in a island.Thus, the argument will be bolstered or enervated from it.
In sum, the author needs to provide more specific evidences to support the argument like:an authentic investigate report of the number of arctic deer from ecologists and the time of the global warming lasting. In addition, the rate of the plants that arctic deer depended on.Without these specific evidence, the author cannot convince me on the claim.
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Sentence: The author argues that because of the recent global warming trend, the deer population are declining.
Description: The fragment the deer population is not usually followed by are
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace are with is
Sentence: If the global warming is so serious and last for a long period of time like several years that makes the whole ice melt in the regions where the deer search for food.Thus,the deer would be limited in a solely island during these long period of time,which,then,may lead to the reduction of the deer populatons regarding of the possibility of their food shortage.
Description: The fragment a solely island is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace solely with adjective
Sentence: In sum, the author needs to provide more specific evidences to support the argument like:an authentic investigate report of the number of arctic deer from ecologists and the time of the global warming lasting.
Description: An adjective is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to authentic and investigate
Sentence: If the global warming is so serious and last for a long period of time like several years that makes the whole ice melt in the regions where the deer search for food.Thus,the deer would be limited in a solely island during these long period of time,which,then,may lead to the reduction of the deer populatons regarding of the possibility of their food shortage.
Error: populatons Suggestion: populations
Sentence: Thus, they still be able to follow their age-old migration patterns.
Error: age-old Suggestion: aged
Sentence: Third,the author needs to cite the evidence about the growth rate of the plant on which they feed, which will decide to some extent whether the deer have the plenty food or not in a island.Thus, the argument will be bolstered or enervated from it.
Error: enervated Suggestion: No alternate word
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 5 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 456 350
No. of Characters: 2094 1500
No. of Different Words: 195 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.621 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.592 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.256 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 147 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 94 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 56 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 30 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26.824 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 15.912 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.765 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.37 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.555 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.119 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5