Argument essay

Essay topics:
Argument essay

The following appeared in a newsletter offering advice to inverstors :

Techno corporation is our top pick for the investment this term. We urge all our clients to invest in this new company. For the first time in ten years, a company that has developed a stellite technology has been approvd by the FTA to compete with current satellite provider. The company is techno corporation. A consumer survey last year indicated that over eighty percent of the respondents were dissatisfied with the current satellite television provider and would want to switch to another provider if the industry were not monopoly.Thus , the new venture of technocorporation into satellite televsion will prove to be highly profitable for those who invest now.

Responce

The investment advice offered in the news letter seems to be genuine, backed up with surveys to support and strengthen their advice. But there are some assumptions which need to be explored in more detail to invest money in to this young technology company. FTA's approval seems to be great to start the operations with company's new satellite technology.

But regulatory approval doesn't mean that automatically customers like it. Some questions need to be answered in this regard. Is this technolgy developed recently? Is it operational any where in the world? If so is there any data available how the real users recived this technology? Does the management is experinced enough to iron out any unintended glitches from this technology. It seems from the letter this technology was developed by this corporation, are they going to keep investing this technology as to develop or ironing out any operational issuses?

A consumer survey's results of eighty-percent dissatisfaction and they wanted to shift the company was great for this new company. If the new company can capitalize on this dissatisfaction to the hilt,then that will give a great start and great returns to the investors. There is no mention of management experience in attracting and keeping the customers in the newsletter.

Management play a pivotal role in executing the strategy and opportunities in the market place. It would have given great insight if the news letter have mentioned thier experience and strength in building a startup company.If this company started by stalwart like Bill gates nobody asks any more questions. But for a new company it is very important for the investors to know the management team and thier past record.

Despite all these questions this investment advie seems to be genuine. Any investment is a risky proposition. In this case the odds seems to be tilted towards the investor. No body can predict the sucess of the company, they can only assume the mangement will take the advantage of the existing opportunities in the market place to the hilt to generate maximum profits to the investors.

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You argued well, but again there are a lot of spelling errors. You are only allowed to have 2 spelling errors.

Sentence: Management play a pivotal role in executing the strategy and opportunities in the market place.
Description: The fragment Management play a is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace play with verb, past tense

Sentence: Is this technolgy developed recently?
Error: technolgy Suggestion: technology

Sentence: If so is there any data available how the real users recived this technology?
Error: recived Suggestion: received

Sentence: Does the management is experinced enough to iron out any unintended glitches from this technology.
Error: experinced Suggestion: experienced

Sentence: A consumer survey's results of eighty-percent dissatisfaction and they wanted to shift the company was great for this new company.
Error: eighty-percent Suggestion: eighty percent

Sentence: Despite all these questions this investment advie seems to be genuine.
Error: advie Suggestion: advise

Sentence: No body can predict the sucess of the company, they can only assume the mangement will take the advantage of the existing opportunities in the market place to the hilt to generate maximum profits to the investors.
Error: sucess Suggestion: success
Error: mangement Suggestion: management

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.5 - 5.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 5 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 348 350
No. of Characters: 1729 1500
No. of Different Words: 180 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.319 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.968 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.858 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 117 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 99 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 69 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 54 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.4 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.754 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.35 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.287 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.513 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.062 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5