Argument task -
The following appeared in a petition presented by classen university students to the school's administration.
The purpose of higher studies is to prepare students for the future, but classen students are at a serious disadvantage in the competition for post-college employment due to the university's burdensome breadth requirements. Classen's job placement rate is substantially lower than placement rates of many top ranked school's. Classen students would be more attractive to emplyers if they had more time to take advanced courses in their speciality, rather than being required to spend fifteen percent of their time at classen taking courses outside of their subject area. We demand, therefore, that the university abandon or drastically cut back on its breadth requirement.
Today's students are tomorrow's future. It is of paramount importance that the students acquire zenith set of skills and knowledge to become powerful citizens of tomorrow. The students at Classen university have put up a petition to make changes in their university curriculum for their advantage.
The future demands for superior quality students with higher education pro forma. The assumption that university's cumbersome requirements are the sole reason for their placement failures is erroneous. There could be many other factors governing the case. The ebb of the recruitments on the contrary may be because of low grades or insufficient practical skills and intellect.
The top rated schools have higher placement rates than Classen's is presented with such paucity of evidence that the possible success of top school's may be due to facts like : 1. They are much bigger firm's than Classen - paves more job opportunities. 2. It could have given admissions only to top grade students with high percentiles - thereby, greater chances of deserving students getting placed. 3. Possess superior trait of equipment, infrastructure and other facilities - which calls for more number of students enrolling with top school's. Is the success of top school's because of mentioned possibilities? If so, the success of Classen's university without the above possibilities would be in question.
Classen's students are required to take courses outside of their subject area. The reader might wonder what is the purpose beneath such an implication? If students ought to spend more than three and a half hours on trivial courses, how much more are they expected to spend on their core subjects? Does not this policy derange student's to score well in their core subjects? University's amendment needs to be useful to the students , not to be detrimental. However, the purpose is served better if the university's motive behind such an act is to prepare their students towards an overall development and to equip them with an idea on every aspect of work.
The students conclude by demanding to abandon the university's requirements is slightly slack. The others factors in question need to be thoroughly and genuinely examined before making such a demand.
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Sentence: They are much bigger firm's than Classen - paves more job opportunities.
Description: A noun, singular, common, genitive is not usually followed by a preposition
Suggestion: Refer to firm's and than
Sentence: Possess superior trait of equipment, infrastructure and other facilities - which calls for more number of students enrolling with top school's. Is the success of top school's because of mentioned possibilities?
Description: The fragment school's because of is rare
Sentence: Does not this policy derange student's to score well in their core subjects?
Description: The tag a noun, singular, common, genitive is not usually followed by to
Suggestion: Refer to student's and to
Sentence: The others factors in question need to be thoroughly and genuinely examined before making such a demand.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to others and factors
flaws:
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.136 21.0
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.265 0.35
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.054 0.07
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 6
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 355 350
No. of Characters: 1851 1500
No. of Different Words: 202 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.341 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.214 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.839 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 146 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 119 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 83 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 49 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.136 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.808 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.273 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.265 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.475 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.054 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5