The luxuries and conveniences of contemporary life prevent people from developing into truly strong and independent individuals.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
To develop into the independent and the strong person,one needs to be intrepid against all the situations,since the convinience of the life does not allow the person to face these situations,the person can never be truly strong and indepondent.
First,without the struggle and the facing difficult situation ,no person can be stronger.After facing the difficult situation,the person first understands that there are not only the positive things in the life but also the various difficulties.He then develops the habit of solving the difficult problems.These struggle inturn makes the person ready for the various hard sitautions.So after facing and solving these difficulties,the person can be strong and since he learns to solve the problem by himself,he will be independent too.One can take the example of the late steve jobs.Jobs ,the founder of the Apple Company after being kicked out of same company he established,he faced the difficult sitaution.But ,he didnot gave up but faced it and developed the solution to the problem.In this case the various ideas and innovations to make the comapny suceesfull.It is therefore no concidence that after his return to his old company Apple,He became sucessful and the companys standing also incresased in terms of market value.
If the person has not faced the difficulties in the life ,he thinks that life is always easy.He thinks that there should be things ready for him,rather than he make it himselves.He never gets to understand that the negative things are there in life and one should be careful and artful to solve this problem.The bad son of the rich father are the classic exaample of this situation.They are used to good thinngs of the life,they never get to know the difficulties.So when faced with the small problem they turn to the drugs and the alcholism and ruin their life.They never turn into strong and independent person .They depend upon the money of their father to run their debauchery.
Another things to be strong and the independent is to know the solution to the diidfult problems in the life.When people rae faced with the immdideate danger of the situation ,they have to get the solution the proble.The People inured to the convinent life style do not face the siutaions and never develop their surviving strategy.
Again ,the person can only be strong by practice ,since the person used to the convienient life style would not face the problem,they will not have sufficient practice againt the difficult situations that make them stronger.There is a saying "The things that doesnot kill you makes you stronger",so only by facibg sufficient difficulties one can be the truly strong person .
While,sometimes the person can learn from the difficiulties and the struggle of the another peron ,the life lessons leraned from one's own failure and the difficulties becomes more permanent and will likely make the person strong and independent.
In conclusion,only through the inconvience and the difficulties one gets to understand the problem and deveop soultion for the same,which inturn will make the ready to face any situations,which inturn will make the person strong and independent.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2013-10-07 | kishorbhandari23 | 60 | view |
| 2013-03-19 | ezb | 51 | view |
| 2013-02-16 | utkarshece | 70 | view |
| 2012-10-30 | madame | 56 | view |
| 2012-10-15 | yjc1989 | 52 | view |
- Some people believe that in order to be effective, political leaders must yield to public opinion and abandon principle for the sake of compromise. Others believe that the most essential quality of an effective leader is the ability to remain consistently 78
- The luxuries and conveniences of contemporary life prevent people from developing into truly strong and independent individuals.Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning f 60
- To understand the most important characteristics of a society, one must study its major cities.Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In deve 65
- The best way to teach is to praise positive actions and ignore negative ones.Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and support 75
- In any field of endeavor, it is impossible to make a significant contribution without first being strongly influenced by past achievements within that field.Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement 50
Sentence: He thinks that there should be things ready for him, rather than he make it himselves.
Description: The fragment he make it is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace make with verb, past tense
Sentence: Another things to be strong and the independent is to know the solution to the diidfult problems in the life.
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to Another and things
Sentence: To develop into the independent and the strong person, one needs to be intrepid against all the situations, since the convinience of the life does not allow the person to face these situations, the person can never be truly strong and indepondent.
Error: convinience Suggestion: convenience
Error: indepondent Suggestion: independent
Sentence: These struggle inturn makes the person ready for the various hard sitautions.
Error: sitautions Suggestion: situations
Error: inturn Suggestion: in turn
Sentence: Jobs, the founder of the Apple Company after being kicked out of same company he established, he faced the difficult sitaution.
Error: sitaution Suggestion: situation
Sentence: In this case the various ideas and innovations to make the comapny suceesfull.
Error: suceesfull Suggestion: successful
Error: comapny Suggestion: company
Sentence: It is therefore no concidence that after his return to his old company Apple, He became sucessful and the companys standing also incresased in terms of market value.
Error: incresased Suggestion: increased
Error: sucessful Suggestion: successful
Error: concidence Suggestion: confidence
Sentence: He thinks that there should be things ready for him, rather than he make it himselves.
Error: himselves Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: The bad son of the rich father are the classic exaample of this situation.
Error: exaample Suggestion: example
Sentence: They are used to good thinngs of the life, they never get to know the difficulties.
Error: thinngs Suggestion: things
Sentence: So when faced with the small problem they turn to the drugs and the alcholism and ruin their life.
Error: alcholism Suggestion: alcoholism
Sentence: Another things to be strong and the independent is to know the solution to the diidfult problems in the life.
Error: diidfult Suggestion: ?
Sentence: When people rae faced with the immdideate danger of the situation, they have to get the solution the proble.
Error: proble Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: immdideate Suggestion: immediate
Error: rae Suggestion: ?
Sentence: The People inured to the convinent life style do not face the siutaions and never develop their surviving strategy.
Error: siutaions Suggestion: situations
Error: convinent Suggestion: continent
Sentence: Again, the person can only be strong by practice, since the person used to the convienient life style would not face the problem, they will not have sufficient practice againt the difficult situations that make them stronger.
Error: convienient Suggestion: convenient
Error: againt Suggestion: again
Sentence: There is a saying The things that doesnot kill you makes you stronger, so only by facibg sufficient difficulties one can be the truly strong person.
Error: doesnot Suggestion: despot
Error: facibg Suggestion: facing
Sentence: While, sometimes the person can learn from the difficiulties and the struggle of the another peron, the life lessons leraned from one's own failure and the difficulties becomes more permanent and will likely make the person strong and independent.
Error: leraned Suggestion: learned
Error: peron Suggestion: person
Error: difficiulties Suggestion: difficulties
Sentence: In conclusion, only through the inconvience and the difficulties one gets to understand the problem and deveop soultion for the same, which inturn will make the ready to face any situations, which inturn will make the person strong and independent.
Error: soultion Suggestion: solution
Error: inturn Suggestion: ?
Error: deveop Suggestion: develop
flaws:
No. of Spelling Errors: 33 2
Number of Paragraphs: 7 5
Better to have 5 paragraphs. Read this link for new GRE issue essay pattern:
http://www.testbig.com/question/gre-issue-essay-questions-new-gre-issue…
Don't put a space before punctuation marks.
Always put a space after punctuation marks. E-rater is sensitive.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 33 2
No. of Sentences: 26 15
No. of Words: 544 350
No. of Characters: 2594 1500
No. of Different Words: 219 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.829 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.768 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.471 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 173 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 112 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 79 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 56 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.923 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.527 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.423 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.314 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.519 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.17 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 7 5