The claim states that though young people is often receive the advice to "follow your dreams", more emphasis should be placed on picking worthy goals and the reason given for this claim is that many people's dream are inherently selfish. Claim makes perfect sense to advise young people to be more focused about picking a worthy goal instead of a dream one because a worthy goal in life should be one working hard for. However, Im not that convinced by the reason given to support this claim by stating that most people's dreams are inherently selfish.
Selecting a correct goal in life is very important. One shouldnt go blindly behind their dream goal. They must spend some time in analysing their interests and fields where they can perform well. Also, a goal must be in a field which could help young youth to use their creativity and innovativeness in a progressive manner. Along with this, a worthy goal should not only help an individual to grow at professional level, but also at personal level. Consider, for example, as children we all have dreamy goals, yet when we grow up we select one specific or a few specific areas of interest. When I was young I dreamt of becoming a doctor, but as I grew I realised that I'm more interested in computers and hence , I opted for engineering field rather than medicines and today Im a software developer. Thus, while picking a goal one must take into considerations of what his/ her fields on interests and where he could clearly see a bright future.
Many times, we come across the examples of such fields where there are no more opportunities in the future. Before picking up a goal one must foresee it's advantages and disadvantages.
There is no clear line between selfish and generous dreams, it varies from person to person. It might seem to be selfish to one but not to the other. Thus, basing claim for selecting a worthy goal on the reason that people's dream are inherently selfish is something I'm not fully convinced with.
In conclusion, I would say emphasising on a worthy goal is important.
- Claim: Even though young people often receive the advice to “follow your dreams,” more emphasis should be placed on picking worthy goals.Reason: Many people’s dreams are inherently selfish. 50
- Claim: Even though young people often receive the advice to “follow your dreams,” more emphasis should be placed on picking worthy goals.Reason: Many people’s dreams are inherently selfish. 50
- A nation should require all of its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college. 50
- A nation should require all of its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college. 62
- The following appeared in a letter from the faculty committee to the president of Seatown University:A study conducted at nearby Oceania University showed that faculty retention is higher when professors are offered free tuition at the university for thei 55
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 439, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: I'm
...ould be one working hard for. However, Im not that convinced by the reason given ...
^^
Line 3, column 57, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: shouldn't
...ect goal in life is very important. One shouldnt go blindly behind their dream goal. The...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 670, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: I'm
...a doctor, but as I grew I realised that Im more interested in computers and hence ...
^^
Line 3, column 711, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...m more interested in computers and hence , I opted for engineering field rather th...
^^
Line 3, column 776, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: I'm
...g field rather than medicines and today Im a software developer. Thus, while picki...
^^
Line 7, column 267, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: I'm
...eam are inherently selfish is something Im not fully convinced with. In conclu...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, hence, however, if, so, thus, well, while, for example, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 19.5258426966 82% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.4196629213 97% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 14.8657303371 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.3162921348 106% => OK
Pronoun: 31.0 33.0505617978 94% => OK
Preposition: 42.0 58.6224719101 72% => OK
Nominalization: 0.0 12.9106741573 0% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1711.0 2235.4752809 77% => OK
No of words: 360.0 442.535393258 81% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.75277777778 5.05705443957 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.35587717469 4.55969084622 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.62761912311 2.79657885939 94% => OK
Unique words: 193.0 215.323595506 90% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.536111111111 0.4932671777 109% => OK
syllable_count: 531.0 704.065955056 75% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 6.24550561798 96% => OK
Article: 3.0 4.99550561798 60% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.10617977528 129% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.77640449438 169% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.38483146067 68% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.2370786517 84% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 21.0 23.0359550562 91% => OK
Sentence length SD: 53.8740039769 60.3974514979 89% => OK
Chars per sentence: 100.647058824 118.986275619 85% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.1764705882 23.4991977007 90% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.70588235294 5.21951772744 90% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 7.80617977528 77% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 10.2758426966 136% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 5.13820224719 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.83258426966 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.350382500825 0.243740707755 144% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.105274492291 0.0831039109588 127% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.179757204314 0.0758088955206 237% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.183645530635 0.150359130593 122% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.207908017249 0.0667264976115 312% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.5 14.1392134831 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 58.62 48.8420337079 120% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 12.1743820225 85% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.27 12.1639044944 84% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.75 8.38706741573 92% => OK
difficult_words: 70.0 100.480337079 70% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 11.8971910112 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.2143820225 93% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.7820224719 85% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.