Learning is primarily a matter of personal discipline; students cannot be motivated by school or college alone.Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position y

Essay topics:

Learning is primarily a matter of personal discipline; students cannot be motivated by school or college alone.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.

How can one learn as most effective as it is possible? There are different key aspects that play an important role in our learning process. Passion and interest in the subject, internal or external motivation, and discipline are some of the most important elements that can attribute to the learning process. Learning to the degree of mastery is impossible without all of the above involved and I agree with the statement in this respect.
Motivation is what encourages us to take action. The source for this spark in our feelings can come from within or without. Parents, friends, and college all have an essential role in motivating us to learn and do our best, but this type of encouragement is not the most important one. If one does not want to learn how to drive a car, no amount of motivation from outside will persuade him to do otherwise. However, if internal motivation, which most likely arises from passion and interest, is combined with external forces of encouragement, then there is practically no obstacle that can stop a person from doing what they are interested in. You see or hear about people with learning disabilities that they have had to face immense problems and how they were able to do so. When you listen to their story, usually a common factor between them is the amount of support they received from outside sources. When this was augmented by their own internal drive, they were able to overcome their battles and prove prosperous. However, encouragement can have a potent impact on a person in the learning process, somewhere along the way everyone will have to face the situation in which he does not want to continue and becomes frustrated. It is at these times that motivation, whether for it to be internal or external, is no longer enough.
The more pertinent aspect of learning is in fact discipline. What is the one key factor that determines success at the end? It is to show up and to persist. If one want to gets results in anything, he needs to have the ability to follow through, and this does not come without a certain degree of discipline. Even if someone is passionate about a subject, music for example, without discipline, without practicing a certain amount of time per day, for a long time, sometime years, he cannot learn how to master the instrument of his choice. We see this sort of example everywhere, from the most inngenious people who have ever lived on this planet such as Thomas Edison, who was told that he is not able to continue his education at the school, to world class athletes, who train day in and day out to learn more and to excel in their perspective fields. Without discipline one cannot continue the path of learning, which is inevitably without end. And it is this outlook on learning that makes my beliefes to align with what the statement is suggesting.
Learning depends on different important factors, but even among those, discipline is of greater importance. Without discipline, you won’t be able to learn what you are most passionate about while if you have discipline, you can bear the most insufferable part of the learning journey. If people start to realize this one deciding factor to learning, the rare stories of prevalence will no longer be so scarce.

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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 366, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: all the
...degree of mastery is impossible without all of the above involved and I agree with the sta...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 172, Rule ID: TO_NON_BASE[1]
Message: The verb after "to" should be in the base form: 'get'.
Suggestion: get
... show up and to persist. If one want to gets results in anything, he needs to have t...
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, however, if, look, so, then, while, as to, for example, in fact, sort of, such as

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 29.0 19.5258426966 149% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.4196629213 89% => OK
Conjunction : 20.0 14.8657303371 135% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 11.3162921348 141% => OK
Pronoun: 55.0 33.0505617978 166% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 95.0 58.6224719101 162% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 12.9106741573 116% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2692.0 2235.4752809 120% => OK
No of words: 563.0 442.535393258 127% => OK
Chars per words: 4.78152753108 5.05705443957 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.87110059796 4.55969084622 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.6829236492 2.79657885939 96% => OK
Unique words: 256.0 215.323595506 119% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.454706927176 0.4932671777 92% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 855.0 704.065955056 121% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 6.24550561798 144% => OK
Article: 3.0 4.99550561798 60% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.10617977528 225% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 6.0 1.77640449438 338% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 6.0 4.38483146067 137% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 20.2370786517 124% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 23.0359550562 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 65.572750438 60.3974514979 109% => OK
Chars per sentence: 107.68 118.986275619 90% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.52 23.4991977007 96% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.44 5.21951772744 66% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 7.80617977528 26% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 10.2758426966 165% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 5.13820224719 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.83258426966 83% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.188934983276 0.243740707755 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0532599456672 0.0831039109588 64% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0448204545927 0.0758088955206 59% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.12539464002 0.150359130593 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0348975175535 0.0667264976115 52% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.3 14.1392134831 87% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 48.8420337079 118% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.1743820225 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.74 12.1639044944 88% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.87 8.38706741573 94% => OK
difficult_words: 112.0 100.480337079 111% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 11.8971910112 55% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.2143820225 96% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.7820224719 93% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.


Rates: 62.5 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.75 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.