"The luxuries and conveniences of contemporary life prevent people from developing into truly strong and independent individuals."
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.
The statement here states the fact that is extremely relevant in today's world. I strongly agree with this statement that giving luxury and conveniences to people prohibits their development into independent and reliable individuals. As a coal
can only become a diamond when it is under pressure, similarly to enhance the abilities of a person, he or she has to go through certain struggles and hardships in order to come out as a responsible person on whom the society can bank upon.
Firstly, a person tends to become lazy when things for him or her become easily available. They tend to take things for granted being oblivious to the efforts put in to reach such a state. Take the case of most of the famous celebrities. We can
see a two-way example from their cases in this. Most of them either struggle a lot in their initial days due to lack of facilities or go through hard emotional failures in order to become what they are today. But does that mean that their children will too happen to be of the same level of achiever? Of course not. How many such cases do you see in which both parent-child are famous for their work? This is mostly because the person went through a lot which moulded him or her into a strong individual whereas their children got all the luxuries, thanks to their parents and remained isolated from worldly hardships. Consequently, they could not become what their parents have.
Secondly, when a person has so many amenities at reachable distance, it prohibits him or her of independent thinking. It makes them dependable on others for everything on others. It prohibits their physical growth as well as mental growth. Not only do they become a liability to the society, their overall contribution in their own life is next to negligible. The society looks for resources such as Dr. Kalam who had no means when he was studying to become a scientist. It doesn't need people like politician Rahul Gandhi who has become a target of jokes because of his foolishness.
Contrary to what has been stated, it can be argued that luxuries and conveniences are earned by these people and they deserve it. But does that mean it applies to everyone who has access to such facilities? In most cases they inherit it from their forefathers. Take the case of children of famous film stars and politicians like the Gandhi family in India. Though their ancestors had struggled and in the end became independent individuals, their children became lucky to have it all at a young age. Also, people who have such luxuries can be told to have the cushion to experiment in their life, without the fear
of consequences of failure. Either they can grow their amenities or contribute to the society. but this seldom happens. It is either by individualistic interest or greed for money.
Lastly, I would again like to point out that when you have a over-the-head comfort cushion, you will worry more about being relaxed than working hard for things in life. It makes the individual weak who becomes highly susceptible to breaking down in tough situations and also dependent on others for trivial things as well.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 219, Rule ID: FAMOUS_CELEBRITY[1]
Message: Use simply 'celebrities'.
Suggestion: celebrities
...h a state. Take the case of most of the famous celebrities. We can see a two-way example from the...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 254, Rule ID: TOO_TO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'to happen'?
Suggestion: to happen
...does that mean that their children will too happen to be of the same level of achiever? Of...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 475, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
... was studying to become a scientist. It doesnt need people like politician Rahul Gandh...
^^^^^^
Line 10, column 96, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: But
...amenities or contribute to the society. but this seldom happens. It is either by in...
^^^
Line 12, column 60, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...in like to point out that when you have a over-the-head comfort cushion, you will...
^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, first, firstly, if, lastly, look, second, secondly, similarly, so, well, whereas, as to, of course, such as, as well as, in most cases
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 19.5258426966 77% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.4196629213 89% => OK
Conjunction : 19.0 14.8657303371 128% => OK
Relative clauses : 20.0 11.3162921348 177% => OK
Pronoun: 65.0 33.0505617978 197% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 81.0 58.6224719101 138% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 12.9106741573 54% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2592.0 2235.4752809 116% => OK
No of words: 541.0 442.535393258 122% => OK
Chars per words: 4.79112754159 5.05705443957 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.82280071112 4.55969084622 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.655622983 2.79657885939 95% => OK
Unique words: 273.0 215.323595506 127% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.504621072089 0.4932671777 102% => OK
syllable_count: 801.0 704.065955056 114% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 17.0 6.24550561798 272% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Interrogative: 2.0 0.740449438202 270% => OK
Article: 3.0 4.99550561798 60% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.77640449438 169% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.38483146067 91% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 30.0 20.2370786517 148% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 23.0359550562 78% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 53.1258882279 60.3974514979 88% => OK
Chars per sentence: 86.4 118.986275619 73% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.0333333333 23.4991977007 77% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.3 5.21951772744 102% => OK
Paragraphs: 8.0 4.97078651685 161% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 5.0 7.80617977528 64% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 10.2758426966 88% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 5.13820224719 156% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 13.0 4.83258426966 269% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.115498138796 0.243740707755 47% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0301426549401 0.0831039109588 36% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0585238432587 0.0758088955206 77% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0615657951614 0.150359130593 41% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0738150809614 0.0667264976115 111% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.1 14.1392134831 71% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 48.8420337079 126% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 12.1743820225 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.21 12.1639044944 84% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.94 8.38706741573 95% => OK
difficult_words: 117.0 100.480337079 116% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 15.0 11.8971910112 126% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.2143820225 82% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.7820224719 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Maximum six paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.