Keeping animals in captivity is cruel There is no reason for zoos to exist in the 21st century How do you agree or disagree with this opinion

Essay topics:

‘Keeping animals in captivity is cruel. There is no reason for zoos to exist in the 21st century.’
How do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Most people see the wild animal as a magnificent and the beast which can be danger and threaten him, to this animal they consider to captive for safety reason. In other opinion, people who has concerned about animal right rejected this way, they assume that better if animal live in their natural environment and growing as same as their growth. However this 2 different view, it is important to see both of them.

Supporter of zoos think that many benefit taking animal in the zoo. Beside you can observe from the first hand and the daily, becoming education media, and also can be placed as breeding program for endangered species. Children who want to know directly about wild living, can be attend and meet the gorillas in the zoo. After that to fill their curious they can learn more from the book which is describing about gorillas, this way is the best way than you took your children in the jungle to see gorilla, and also give direct experience than you teach them to watch video about gorilla. Furthermore, for endangered animal which can survive in their natural environment, zoo can help them to breeding, actually with tested way and engaging scientist with valid research.

For the oppose they refuse captivity, because there is cruel for natural animal life. Moreover keeping animal in the zoo can be way to increasing animal stress, it can be understand because natural environment is the best field for animal to grow. Other group who cannot follow these assume is the group which have entertainment purpose, visiting and take some picture in the zoo is quiet enough, and they do not care anything.

In my view, it is important to the zoos taking important role in the 21st century. They should be considered many view from each group, who supported and opposed. Not only provide the education and entertainment side, but also the animal welfare should be aware.

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Average: 6.5 (10 votes)
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2013-11-03 Sekar Hanafi 65 view
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Sentence: In other opinion, people who has concerned about animal right rejected this way, they assume that better if animal live in their natural environment and growing as same as their growth.
Description: The fragment animal live in is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace live with verb, past participle

Sentence: For the oppose they refuse captivity, because there is cruel for natural animal life.
Description: The token the is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to the and oppose

Sentence: Moreover keeping animal in the zoo can be way to increasing animal stress, it can be understand because natural environment is the best field for animal to grow.
Description: The fragment be understand because is rare

Suggestions:
Improve the language and start from grammar.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.5 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 323 350
No. of Characters: 1521 1500
No. of Different Words: 168 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.239 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.709 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.316 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 104 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 67 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 42 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 25 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.071 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.003 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.571 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.367 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.577 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.144 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5