In many parts of the world, children’s lives were very different from today. What do you think were the advantages and disadvantages of life for children in the past?

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In many parts of the world, children’s lives were very different from today. What do you think were the advantages and disadvantages of life for children in the past?

In the past, some parents believed that all parents in the world had the same way of teaching their children about daily activities. While there were many advantages for children, some people should consider that there more disadvantages of living a life in the past.

There were a number of benefits of children’s ways of life in the past. Firstly, parents believed that children did not need any technology devices, for example: a television, a computer or a mobile phone because they would not have any time to spend their quality time to play outside with other friends who lived nearby. Secondly, parents could control their children directly, when family was in a living room together without any disturbing from children’s gadget.

However, in my view, there are more advantages that parents should see of using technology devices on children’s living nowadays. The most influence that parent can get is, when children use their own gadget, they will feel not being under pressure to be stressful at school because a gadget can help a student to look for sources of knowledge or games, and children will enjoy doing inside activity than going outside such a climbing tree or swimming in rivers. The popular way of children’s lifestyle recently has influenced by parents’ abilities. In recently years, parents have good financial to take children by car, but parents cannot look after family member at home, so their duties have replaced by a babysitter.

All in all, I believe the disadvantages of children way of living in the past were greater than the advantages. Children had more outside experiences, but children were not always able to benefit from it because they had less ability of using modern technology that support their education over their own lives both at home and school.

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2013-11-14 Fadlanmuzakki 60 view
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Sentence: While there were many advantages for children, some people should consider that there more disadvantages of living a life in the past.
Description: An existential there is not usually followed by a determiner/pronoun, post-determiner
Suggestion: Refer to there and more

Sentence: In recently years, parents have good financial to take children by car, but parents cannot look after family member at home, so their duties have replaced by a babysitter.
Description: The fragment In recently years is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace recently with adjective

Sentence: All in all, I believe the disadvantages of children way of living in the past were greater than the advantages.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to children and way

flaws:
Need to talk 'the advantages and disadvantages of life for children in the past' not for children now.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.5 out of 9
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 11 15
No. of Words: 299 350
No. of Characters: 1466 1500
No. of Different Words: 164 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.158 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.903 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.479 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 108 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 83 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 52 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 25 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 27.182 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 13.217 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.636 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.438 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.634 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.125 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5