Universities should acceptequal numbers of male andfemale students in everysubject.To what extend doyou agree or disagree?

Essay topics:

Universities should accept
equal numbers of male and
female students in every
subject.To what extend do
you agree or disagree?

Education is prominent to set the pillar of success for every individual in this jet age of 21st century. It has been extremely debatable whether universties should accept equal number of both genders for each subject or not. Here, I would like to discord with given statement.

There are numerous reasons to support my view point. First and foremost, irrefutably, there is a considerable difference between the choice of male and female regarding career fields. For example, unlike females, males seem less intersted to join cooking streams for future career thus, a massive number of seats is likely to be vacant especially of men if equal seats are reserved for both gender. Therefore, given idea does not deserve appreciation.

Furthermore, it is capital idea to opt students on the basis of deservence for each field whether one is male or female must not be an issue.In addition, men are naturally blessed with adequate physical power and interst towards adventurous works like agriculture, working in mines, travel guides so on where as women have more inclination towards smart professions like fashion, weaving , tailoring so on. Hence, the number of seats should be kept of behalf of interest of both towards each particular field.

what is more, under equal empowerment of selection, quality students may not be eligible for the choice of academic field. For instance, if 100 seats are equally devided for men and women for farming or vetnary field, it is quite obvious that females will be less willing to join such fields thus, plenty of seats especially of women will remain vacant simulteanously men in abundance will have to be deprive of desired fields. Consequently, concept of given statement does not fully hold the water.

To recapitulate, opportunities for educational fields need to be set up according to requirement, interest, capability and deservence of each individual without caring sex determining.

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2013-11-17 Justin 60 view
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Comments

it is capital idea
it is a capital idea

whether one is male or female must not be an issue.
Description: two verbs in one sentence.

Sentence: It has been extremely debatable whether universties should accept equal number of both genders for each subject or not.
Error: universties Suggestion: universities

Sentence: For example, unlike females, males seem less intersted to join cooking streams for future career thus, a massive number of seats is likely to be vacant especially of men if equal seats are reserved for both gender.
Error: intersted Suggestion: interested

Sentence: Furthermore, it is capital idea to opt students on the basis of deservence for each field whether one is male or female must not be an issue.In addition, men are naturally blessed with adequate physical power and interst towards adventurous works like agriculture, working in mines, travel guides so on where as women have more inclination towards smart professions like fashion, weaving , tailoring so on.
Error: interst Suggestion: interest
Error: deservence Suggestion: ?

Sentence: For instance, if 100 seats are equally devided for men and women for farming or vetnary field, it is quite obvious that females will be less willing to join such fields thus, plenty of seats especially of women will remain vacant simulteanously men in abundance will have to be deprive of desired fields.
Error: devided Suggestion: divided
Error: simulteanously Suggestion: simultaneously
Error: vetnary Suggestion: very

flaws:
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.018 0.07

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 7.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
No. of Sentences: 13 15
No. of Words: 312 350
No. of Characters: 1576 1500
No. of Different Words: 184 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.203 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.051 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.731 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 119 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 90 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 53 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 40 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 17.119 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.615 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.311 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.585 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.018 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5

For example: if your firs sentence is talking about A, better next sentence is about A+ or A-, or Maybe B, but not C or D which is far from A. This is coherence.

Look at this:
Furthermore, it is capital idea to opt students on the basis of deservence for each field whether one is male or female must not be an issue. In addition, men are naturally blessed with adequate physical power and interst towards adventurous works like agriculture, working ...

The first sentence Furthermore... and second sentence In addition,...are not closely related.

Try this pattern to get high coherence:

Para 1: introduction. my choice: A or B. agree or disagree.

Para 2:First,reason 1 (1 sentence) + why reason 1(some arguments. 2-3 sentences) + examples for reason 1 (around 2 sentences) + small conclusions (like advantages of reason 1 or comparisons if not reason 1, 1-2 sentences).

Para 3:Second,reason 2 ,blabla... do the same thing like First

Para 4:Third, reason 3 blabla... do the same thing like First but shorter

Para 5: Conclusion.