Argue either in support of or against the following statements:Fathers are just as capable as mothers of taking care of children, so men should share parenting work more equally with women.

Essay topics:

Argue either in support of or against the following statements:

Fathers are just as capable as mothers of taking care of children, so men should share parenting work more equally with women.

Gender equality became the heated debate among society nowadays. Most of people realize that both men and women should share about their daily job without any discrimination, including in household duty such as parenting. In traditional culture, parenting work supposed to be women duty, but some in today life assure that fathers also have to take action in parenting. It has been my thought that parenting work should be done by fathers and mothers as parents comparatively. This essay aims to explain more about this issue.

Some people believe that mothers should have whole responsibility toward childcare, because fathers have other jobs to defray the family. This traditional perspective still exist in some societies today. For instance we can see that it is still rare to see men parenting in publis especially in Indonesia, with the patriarchy system in society. Women are seen as the responsible person of all house hold duties, while husband do not have obligation to do it.

As time goes by, with the increasing number of well-educated people in community, more and more people understand about father’s role in parenting. Furthermore, the current psychology research shows that father’s affection toward their children will have a very big impact to children psychological development. For example, when children have a good connection with their fathers they will tend to develop their leadership skill and courage in the future. Moreover, by taking a part in parenting work, fathers will have a strong bounding with their children as well as with their mothers.

According to my opinion, the latest argument is more acceptable than the previous one. Because, actually children are both fathers and mothers responsibility as the parents. When men and women cooperate in parenting work, it is not only good in building their connection with their children but also they maintaining their relation with their wifes. Sharing the parenting work can encourage wifes and make them feel appreciated as a partner. So father’s role is totally importance in a family.

To sum up, it is really necessary for a family to have well-manage parenting work. Because it will have a big impact in children growth and family bounding. Furthermore, it will change the traditional perspective in society about men and women duty, so it will directly influence the gender equality perspective in society.

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while husband do not have obligation to do it.
while husbands do not have obligation to do it.

it is not only good in building their connection with their children but also they maintaining their relation
Description: 'Not only...but also' is not used properly. can you re-write this sentence?

is totally importance in a family.
is totally important in a family.

Sentence: Because, actually children are both fathers and mothers responsibility as the parents.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to mothers and responsibility

Sentence: Because it will have a big impact in children growth and family bounding.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to children and growth

Sentence: Furthermore, it will change the traditional perspective in society about men and women duty, so it will directly influence the gender equality perspective in society.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to women and duty

Sentence: For instance we can see that it is still rare to see men parenting in publis especially in Indonesia, with the patriarchy system in society.
Error: publis Suggestion: public

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 385 350
No. of Characters: 1970 1500
No. of Different Words: 192 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.43 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.117 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.75 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 146 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 111 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 77 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 52 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.333 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.357 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.619 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.302 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.509 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.081 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5