Every year several languages die out. Some people think that this is not important because life will be easier if there are fewer languages in the world. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion.
It is undoubtedly true that many people around the world are expressing deeply growing concern that, as most of spoken languages are going to vanish on a yearly basis, as a consequent life would be quite convenient with just few remained languages. I strongly hold the view that speaking only standard and international languages is a vital key to a bright future.
In first the place, it is irrefutable that having adequate and appropriate knowledge of few popular languages is very essential to succeed in this fast paced and highly demanding new technical modern world. In case of failure of attaining, this skill would ultimately be very detrimental by creating lots of anxiety and frustration. This is a time of , survival for fittest, so you should be well prepared in equipping yourself with all the essential demands of this modern society, learning skill is one of the most decisive elements among all these valuable techniques.
Secondly, in this global village it is impossible to survive even without knowing the most popular used languages. Now days no one is independent in terms of economy and businesses. With the development of this internet, most of the education and businesses are international. So we cannot spare ourselves from learning standard language for our economical and social wellbeing.
However there is a wide range of evidence for supporters to defend their ideas, they argue that the survival of local languages is a key to represent the culture and the history. It defines ours existence and values. With the elimination of these languages, has put ours culture and traditions in risk.
To sum up, although it is very important to keep the culture alive by promoting the local languages, but at the same time it is inevitable to neglect the role of few international languages in the economic survival and to create a well confident and productive society, which would ultimately ensure a convenient future.
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Now days no one is independent
Nowadays no one is independent
With the elimination of these languages, has put ours culture and traditions in risk.
With the elimination of these languages, it has put ours culture and traditions in risk.
although it is very important to keep the culture alive by promoting the local languages, but at the same time...
Description: don't put 'although' 'but' in one sentence.
Sentence: It defines ours existence and values.
Description: A pronoun, possessive is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to ours and existence
flaws:
You need to focus more on 'Every year several languages die out. Some people think that this is not important'. While most of your ideas are about 'life will be easier if there are fewer languages in the world'.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 13 15
No. of Words: 320 350
No. of Characters: 1592 1500
No. of Different Words: 181 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.229 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.975 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.828 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 117 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 96 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 73 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 50 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.615 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 13.692 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.462 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.322 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.613 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.077 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5