Some people think that students who don't take a break in studies between high school and university are at a disadvantage compared to students who travel and work after high school before furthering their education. Do you agree or disagree?

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Some people think that students who don't take a break in studies between high school and university are at a disadvantage compared to students who travel and work after high school before furthering their education. Do you agree or disagree?

In today's world, many students from developed countries like US and UK decides to take a year off between school and university education. They spend this time for traveling, working or engaging in charitable works. Though many supports its advantages, i personally disagree with the viewpoint that pupils who doesn't undertake break has a lower hand.

There are two major arguments in favor of students taking breaks before university study. First, they tend to travel around the country in those period and learns a lot about different cultures, traditions and people's way of living. This enhances their knowledge on outside world and enlightens their mind. Hence, when they join higher education after traveling, their brain will be fresh enough to learn better education. Secondly, many students goes to work and experience practical learning. Owing to this practical knowledge, their skill level multiplies and the chances of shining in education increases. Additionally, by earning their own money, they understands the importance of it in today's economic world. Hence they acknowledges the fact that to survive in this materialistic world, they have to study hard and get a decent job.

When we turn to the other side of the argument, there are some strong reasons to oppose the above-mentioned views. Perhaps the most important is the lack of consistency in the way, how people study after a long interval. Nowadays many students in western countries face these issues. People who study regularly and consistently can only be able to concentrate on subjects and can score good marks. Further, when the students starts working and earns money on their own, knowingly or unknowingly, their liking towards money grows. As they tastes the different flavors of money, they become addict to that and tends them to concentrate on earning money. Owing to this, their plan of joining higher studies turns to questionable.

In conclusion, while there are some advantages for students to take a break between studies, there are high chances that this gap may not be healthy and may lead them to a different path rather than learning. This will definitely spoil the students future. I strongly assert that it's disadvantages outweigh the benefits.

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Sentence: Additionally, by earning their own money, they understands the importance of it in today's economic world.
Description: A pronoun, personal, nominative, not 3rd person singular is not usually followed by a verb, present tense, 3rd person singular
Suggestion: Refer to they and understands

Sentence: Hence they acknowledges the fact that to survive in this materialistic world, they have to study hard and get a decent job.
Description: A pronoun, personal, nominative, not 3rd person singular is not usually followed by a verb, present tense, 3rd person singular
Suggestion: Refer to they and acknowledges

Perhaps the most important is
Perhaps the most important one is

when the students starts working
when the students start working

Sentence: As they tastes the different flavors of money, they become addict to that and tends them to concentrate on earning money.
Description: A pronoun, personal, nominative, not 3rd person singular is not usually followed by a verb, present tense, 3rd person singular
Suggestion: Refer to they and tastes

Sentence: This will definitely spoil the students future.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to students and future

Sentence: I strongly assert that it's disadvantages outweigh the benefits.
Description: A pronoun, personal, nominative, 3rd person singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to it's and disadvantages

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 362 350
No. of Characters: 1840 1500
No. of Different Words: 213 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.362 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.083 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.643 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 126 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 97 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 72 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 48 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.238 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.725 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.238 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.258 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.432 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.047 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5