Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair. Discuss both these views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or
In modern society, people have different opinions on whether it is fair or not about the people who are popular on a specific sport being more wealthy against whom counterpart. In my opinion, it is worth the sports expert to be rich because of distinctiveness of the sports industry.
As a matter of fact, professional atheletes need more well-made, technically designed gears in order to perform better records in the competitions. That is why there are a lot of commpanies which produce various sport gears those all have an intention to hire athletic celebrities as a commercial advertisement model. Those companies advertise that one famous athlete who put the gears made by the company on showed a fabulous performance in the competition to ordinary people. It is seriously effective way to announce their products are beneficial to use in general.
On the other hand, regarding the other experts, such as doctors, teachers and so on, they recognise that they are really essencial in the community, however, unfortunately, there is nobody to support financially. This is because there are no commercial benefits to support them. Despite of this reason, those kind of professional careers distribute to our society more than expert athletes indeed.
In conclusion, in my point of view, it is inevitable that the sports celebrities are able to earn more money because of the situation that I stated. Therefore, it is fair especially in the commercial perspective.
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Sentence: In my opinion, it is worth the sports expert to be rich because of distinctiveness of the sports industry.
Description: The tag an adjective is not usually followed by the
Suggestion: Refer to worth and the
which produce various sport gears those all have an intention to hire athletic celebrities
Description: can you re-write this sentence?
It is seriously effective way to announce their products are beneficial to use in general.
It is seriously an effective way to announce their products which are beneficial to use in general.
they recognise that they are really essencial in the community,
Description: 'they' refers to what? Be sensitive to use 'they'.
Sentence: As a matter of fact, professional atheletes need more well-made, technically designed gears in order to perform better records in the competitions.
Error: atheletes Suggestion: athletes
Sentence: That is why there are a lot of commpanies which produce various sport gears those all have an intention to hire athletic celebrities as a commercial advertisement model.
Error: commpanies Suggestion: companies
Sentence: On the other hand, regarding the other experts, such as doctors, teachers and so on, they recognise that they are really essencial in the community, however, unfortunately, there is nobody to support financially.
Error: recognise Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: essencial Suggestion: essential
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Words: 238 350
Minimum 250 words wanted.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 11 15
No. of Words: 238 350
No. of Characters: 1200 1500
No. of Different Words: 148 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.928 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.042 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.969 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 91 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 73 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 49 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 37 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.636 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.535 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.545 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.351 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.602 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.053 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5