You have enough money to purchase either a house or a business. Which
would you choose to buy? Give specific reasons to explain your choice.
Money is more important thing to use in this era. With money, we can buy whatever we want like house or we can make it to become a business. Several persons believe that you must buy a house. However, not many societies think that you must make a business. I choose statement that I have enough money to pay for a business. I will offer some excuses to make clear my choice.
The first thing that should be note is money to business. If they have business, they will be able to buy everything they want. Indra Noviansya is one of the boys who has been famous since 2011 because she has business that is about waste recycling. Eddy Suaib is one of the men who has been possessing English course in pare, province East Java. He has been opening his course since 2013 when he was only 25 years. Those are young businessmen figures who are in different kind of entrepreneur.
Standing in contrast, there are many people who have enough money to buy house. Have you heard about Jim Walton and David Koch?. They bought a few houses. Both of them have been had houses in several countries. Instead, they have cash to purchase houses.
Having sufficient money to buy a house is not a guarantee for a tasty life. People need business to inlay their life in a future. For instance, a man with his a company can spin his money to make the other companies. There is no an important to buy a house, because we must think our future, even if you have many houses.
Ultimately, in my personal opinion is that we need enough money for making a business.
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| 2014-01-18 | syahid prabowo | 70 | view |
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Money is more important thing to use in this era.
Money is a very important thing to use in this era.
Sentence: Both of them have been had houses in several countries.
Description: The word had is not usually used as a verb 'to have', past participle
Suggestion: Refer to had
Sentence: For instance, a man with his a company can spin his money to make the other companies.
Description: The tag a determiner, possessive is not usually followed by a
Suggestion: Refer to his and a
in my personal opinion is that we need enough money for making a business.
in my personal opinion , we need enough money for making a business.
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 285 350
No. of Characters: 1216 1500
No. of Different Words: 155 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.109 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.267 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.192 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 67 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 45 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 31 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 16 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 12.955 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 4.311 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.318 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.305 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.516 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.173 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5