Nowadays, young people have a passion with entertainment programs such as game shows, K.pop or movies,… but they don’t know about some famous historical people in their country. In this essay, I will discuss about why this is and some approach to encourage people find about their history instead of international pop and movie star characters. This is no denying that history is a main subject in school of education but almost student fell bored with it. Although teachers try to teach about some famous people in the history of their country, they still don’t have a good way to transfer for their students. Besides, people usually only have attractive with some famous figures in their field. An example, if you are a chemical student and your passion is chemistry, of course you will know some people in this subject more than any subject. In the opposite, international pop and movie stars are so attractive with their talent and they have a lot of ways to make people remember them because this is the way to earn money of them. Celebrities always appear with the beautiful clothes and their activities usually bring to people relaxing moment and they are also supported by a lot of social media like Facebook, Instagram,… this is the best way to become common.
It is very difficult to make people change their habits and make them have to notice some famous historical people but it isn’t mean that it is impossible. With the development of movies and films, the government can encourage the domestic directors to make films or series films about famous historical people in their country. China is a country that stand in the top of this field, they use the real characters in this country, this is not only famous in China, but it also create the wave of Chinese films in some Asian countries. Besides, the education system have other ways to transfer knowledge about famous people in the country by some conferences or activities to study about the history.
In conclusion, the history is very important for people and they have to change the way to transfer it to students to achieve the purpose that young people interested in famous figures in history instead of celebrities or movie stars.
- The graph below gives information about the number of cases of diarrhea in Mashhad between 1983 and 1992 Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant 56
- The chart below shows information about fuel used in the transport sector in different countries in Europe compared to the EU average in 2009 and 2010 56
- Many young people today know more about international pop and movie stars than about famous people in the history of their country Why is this What can be done to increase young people s interest in famous people in the history of their country 67
- The chart below shows information about fuel used in the transport sector in different countries in Europe compared to the EU average in 2009 and 2010 56
- The graph below gives information about the number of cases of diarrhea in Mashhad between 1983 and 1992 Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant 78
Nowadays, young people have…
Nowadays, young people have a passion for entertainment programs such as game shows, K.pop or movies,… but they are unaware of their country's own famous and historical people. In this essay, I will discuss the reasons for this and methods to encourage people to find out about their own history rather than the international pop and movie star characters.
Without a doubt, history is a main subject in educational institutions but the majority of students feel bored with it. Although teachers attempt to educate students about famous people in the history of their country, their method of approach is ineffective. Besides, people are usually knowledgeable of famous (influential) figures in their field. For example, if you are a chemical student and your passion is chemistry, of course you would be well acquainted with outstanding individuals in this field. On the other hand, international pop and movie stars have exceptional abilities and stunning looks, for a certainty they are remembered by the masses.
Social media continues to be a revolutionary tool in allowing strangers into the personal lives of celebrities, so they use it to their advantage. The film industry could be used by, the government to encourage the domestic directors to make films or series films about famous historical people in their country. China is a country that stand in the top of this field, they use the real characters in this country, this is not only famous in China, but it also create the wave of Chinese films in some Asian countries. Besides, the education system have other ways to transfer knowledge about famous people in the country by some conferences or activities to study about the history.
In conclusion, the history is very important for people and they have to change the way to transfer it to students to achieve the purpose that young people interested in famous figures in history instead of celebrities or movie stars
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 102, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , …
...rams such as game shows, K.pop or movies,… but they don’t know about some famous h...
^^
Line 1, column 709, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...mous figures in their field. An example, if you are a chemical student and your p...
^^
Line 1, column 1229, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , …
...of social media like Facebook, Instagram,… this is the best way to become common. ...
^^
Line 2, column 477, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'creates'?
Suggestion: creates
...s not only famous in China, but it also create the wave of Chinese films in some Asian...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, if, so, still, in conclusion, of course, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 13.1623246493 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 7.85571142285 38% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 10.4138276553 173% => OK
Relative clauses : 4.0 7.30460921844 55% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 41.0 24.0651302605 170% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 60.0 41.998997996 143% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.3376753507 60% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1839.0 1615.20841683 114% => OK
No of words: 379.0 315.596192385 120% => OK
Chars per words: 4.85224274406 5.12529762239 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.41224685777 4.20363070211 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.54277460451 2.80592935109 91% => OK
Unique words: 169.0 176.041082164 96% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.445910290237 0.561755894193 79% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 573.3 506.74238477 113% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.60771543086 93% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 5.43587174349 110% => OK
Article: 4.0 2.52805611222 158% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.10420841683 95% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 0.809619238477 124% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.76152304609 105% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 16.0721442886 81% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 29.0 20.2975951904 143% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 40.7365616568 49.4020404114 82% => OK
Chars per sentence: 141.461538462 106.682146367 133% => OK
Words per sentence: 29.1538461538 20.7667163134 140% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.23076923077 7.06120827912 74% => OK
Paragraphs: 3.0 4.38176352705 68% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 4.0 5.01903807615 80% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.67935871743 115% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.9879759519 50% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.485893828579 0.244688304435 199% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.202285622394 0.084324248473 240% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0892604203506 0.0667982634062 134% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.346326306341 0.151304729494 229% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0521022676985 0.056905535591 92% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.0 13.0946893788 122% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.5 50.2224549098 101% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 11.3001002004 119% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.44 12.4159519038 92% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.74 8.58950901804 90% => OK
difficult_words: 64.0 78.4519038076 82% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 9.78957915832 138% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.6 10.1190380762 134% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 10.7795591182 130% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Minimum four paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 56.1797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 9
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.