The percentage of overweight children in western society has
increased by almost 20% in the last ten years.
Discuss the causes and effects of this disturbing trend.
Over the last ten years, western societies have seen close to a 20% rise in the number of children who are overweight.This essay will discuss some reasons why this has occurred and examine the consequences of this worrying trend.The main cause of this problem is poor diet. Over the last decade there has been a prolific increase in the number of fast food restaurants. For example,onnearlyeveryhighstreetthereisaMacDonald’s,Kentucky
Fried Chicken and Pizza Hut. The food in these places has been proven
to be very unhealthy, and much of the advertising is targeted at
children, thus ensuring that they constitute the bulk of the customers
of these establishments. However, it is not only due to eating out, but also
the type of diet many children have at home. A lot of food consumed is
processed food, especially with regards to ready-made meals which
are a quick and easy option for parents who are working hard.
The effects of this have been and will continue to be very serious. Firstly, there has been a large increase in health related diseases
amongst children, especially diabetes. This debilitating illness means a
child has to be injected with insulin for the rest of their life. Not only this,
very overweight children often experience bullying from other children,
which may affect their mental health. The negative stigma of being
overweight may also affect self-esteem.
To sum up, it is evident that there are several causes of obesity amongst
children, and a variety of negative effects. Society must ensure steps are
taken to prevent this problem from deteriorating further.
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| 2017-04-06 | naquan2205 | 84 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
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Suggestion: This
...e number of children who are overweight.This essay will discuss some reasons why thi...
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Suggestion: The
...the consequences of this worrying trend.The main cause of this problem is poor diet...
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Suggestion: , onnearlyeveryhighstreetthereisaMacDonald&apos
...er of fast food restaurants. For example,onnearlyeveryhighstreetthereisaMacDonald's,Kentucky Fried Chicken and Pizza ...
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Line 1, column 439, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
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Suggestion: , Kentucky
...highstreetthereisaMacDonald's,Kentucky Fried Chicken and Pizza Hut. The food...
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...The food in these places has been proven to be very unhealthy, and much of the ad...
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...d much of the advertising is targeted at children, thus ensuring that they consti...
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Suggestion:
...hey constitute the bulk of the customers of these establishments. However, it is ...
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...constitute the bulk of the customers of these establishments. However, it is no...
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... is not only due to eating out, but also the type of diet many children have at h...
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...not only due to eating out, but also the type of diet many children have at home...
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... have at home. A lot of food consumed is processed food, especially with regards ...
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...y with regards to ready-made meals which are a quick and easy option for parents ...
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...th regards to ready-made meals which are a quick and easy option for parents who...
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...arge increase in health related diseases amongst children, especially diabetes. T...
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... increase in health related diseases amongst children, especially diabetes. This deb...
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...betes. This debilitating illness means a child has to be injected with insulin fo...
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...s. This debilitating illness means a child has to be injected with insulin for the...
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...r the rest of their life. Not only this, very overweight children often experienc...
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...experience bullying from other children, which may affect their mental health. Th...
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Message: “which” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...rience bullying from other children, which may affect their mental health. The neg...
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...tal health. The negative stigma of being overweight may also affect self-esteem. ...
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Suggestion: Overweight
...health. The negative stigma of being overweight may also affect self-esteem. To su...
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...re are several causes of obesity amongst children, and a variety of negative effe...
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...re several causes of obesity amongst children, and a variety of negative effects. Soc...
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...e effects. Society must ensure steps are taken to prevent this problem from deter...
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Suggestion: Taken
...fects. Society must ensure steps are taken to prevent this problem from deteriorat...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, however, if, may, so, thus, as to, for example, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 13.1623246493 137% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 7.85571142285 64% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 10.4138276553 67% => OK
Relative clauses : 6.0 7.30460921844 82% => OK
Pronoun: 17.0 24.0651302605 71% => OK
Preposition: 36.0 41.998997996 86% => OK
Nominalization: 1.0 8.3376753507 12% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1405.0 1615.20841683 87% => OK
No of words: 260.0 315.596192385 82% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.40384615385 5.12529762239 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.01553427287 4.20363070211 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 5.08661080362 2.80592935109 181% => OK
Unique words: 153.0 176.041082164 87% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.588461538462 0.561755894193 105% => OK
syllable_count: 414.0 506.74238477 82% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 5.43587174349 74% => OK
Article: 6.0 2.52805611222 237% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 0.0 2.10420841683 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 3.0 0.809619238477 371% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 5.0 4.76152304609 105% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 16.0721442886 81% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 20.0 20.2975951904 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 55.751986724 49.4020404114 113% => OK
Chars per sentence: 108.076923077 106.682146367 101% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.0 20.7667163134 96% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.46153846154 7.06120827912 92% => OK
Paragraphs: 17.0 4.38176352705 388% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 26.0 5.01903807615 518% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 3.0 8.67935871743 35% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 3.9879759519 201% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 3.4128256513 59% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.283448136346 0.244688304435 116% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0813172475719 0.084324248473 96% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.092393018806 0.0667982634062 138% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0605711706876 0.151304729494 40% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0794431168805 0.056905535591 140% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.0 13.0946893788 107% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 51.18 50.2224549098 102% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.44779559118 42% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 11.3001002004 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.04 12.4159519038 113% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.76 8.58950901804 102% => OK
difficult_words: 68.0 78.4519038076 87% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 9.78957915832 138% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.1190380762 99% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 10.7795591182 130% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Maximum five paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 61.797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.