Some people think that more money should be spent on protecting endangered species while others think it is waste of valuable money.What is your opinion?

Essay topics:

Some people think that more money should be spent on protecting endangered species while others think it is waste of valuable money.

What is your opinion?

It is human's responsibility to protect flora and fauna.Some people believe that crowd should spend extensively for protect those animals which are in danger, while others think that it is wasteful thing.This essay will discuss as to why more money should be spent on it.

On the one hand, those who believed that it is squander of money for numerious reasons.First of all, government should spend huge amount of money on industrial sectors who will give job opportunity to youngsters, rather than on endangered animals.Because it is necessary for government bodies to focus on industrial development rather than spending money on those species which are in threat by which, plenty of capital could be consumed . For instance, China recentaly spent one third of its GDP on protecting them due to that, at present there is the time of recession.

On the other hand, it is crucial to nation for several reasons.Firstly, as they are salient factor in country's development, government has to spend money to protect them.Because it is best way to bring back touristers from worldwide to watch them at cages where they are kept.If more visitors come, they will enhance the income sources for government.Furthermore, due to that youngsters will get essential information on how much these animals are important for nation as these are pride of nation.

To conclude, despite the waste of money of protecting animals which are at edge of extinction.I believed that it is prominent for nation to progress economically, industrially and globally.

Votes
Average: 5.6 (1 vote)
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IELTS Writing Task II - IELTS Academic

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 56, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Some
...sponsibility to protect flora and fauna.Some people believe that crowd should spend ...
^^^^
Line 3, column 204, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: This
... others think that it is wasteful thing.This essay will discuss as to why more money...
^^^^
Line 9, column 48, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'squandered'.
Suggestion: squandered
...one hand, those who believed that it is squander of money for numerious reasons.First of...
^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 88, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: First
...squander of money for numerious reasons.First of all, government should spend huge am...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 248, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Because
...ters, rather than on endangered animals.Because it is necessary for government bodies t...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 438, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...ich, plenty of capital could be consumed . For instance, China recentaly spent one...
^^
Line 15, column 64, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Firstly
...s crucial to nation for several reasons.Firstly, as they are salient factor in countrys...
^^^^^^^
Line 15, column 171, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Because
...ment has to spend money to protect them.Because it is best way to bring back touristers...
^^^^^^^
Line 15, column 171, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Because” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ment has to spend money to protect them.Because it is best way to bring back touristers...
^^^^^^^
Line 15, column 182, Rule ID: THE_SUPERLATIVE[4]
Message: A determiner is probably missing here: 'is the best'.
Suggestion: is the best
... spend money to protect them.Because it is best way to bring back touristers from world...
^^^^^^^
Line 15, column 277, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: If
...watch them at cages where they are kept.If more visitors come, they will enhance t...
^^
Line 15, column 352, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Furthermore
...hance the income sources for government.Furthermore, due to that youngsters will get essent...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 21, column 95, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: I
...animals which are at edge of extinction.I believed that it is prominent for natio...
^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, firstly, furthermore, if, so, third, while, as to, for instance, first of all, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 13.1623246493 129% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 7.85571142285 102% => OK
Conjunction : 2.0 10.4138276553 19% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 13.0 7.30460921844 178% => OK
Pronoun: 28.0 24.0651302605 116% => OK
Preposition: 41.0 41.998997996 98% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 8.3376753507 120% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1312.0 1615.20841683 81% => OK
No of words: 249.0 315.596192385 79% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.26907630522 5.12529762239 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.97237131171 4.20363070211 94% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.17232028648 2.80592935109 113% => OK
Unique words: 140.0 176.041082164 80% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.562248995984 0.561755894193 100% => OK
syllable_count: 399.6 506.74238477 79% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 5.43587174349 110% => OK
Article: 0.0 2.52805611222 0% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.10420841683 238% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.76152304609 105% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 5.0 16.0721442886 31% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 49.0 20.2975951904 241% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 141.535295951 49.4020404114 286% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 262.4 106.682146367 246% => Less chars_per_sentence wanted.
Words per sentence: 49.8 20.7667163134 240% => Less words per sentence wanted.
Discourse Markers: 20.6 7.06120827912 292% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 13.0 5.01903807615 259% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.67935871743 46% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.9879759519 25% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 3.4128256513 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.246774506905 0.244688304435 101% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.142294358202 0.084324248473 169% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.109793230683 0.0667982634062 164% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.167143783109 0.151304729494 110% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.111520776118 0.056905535591 196% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 28.3 13.0946893788 216% => Automated_readability_index is high.
flesch_reading_ease: 21.74 50.2224549098 43% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 13.0 7.44779559118 175% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 22.4 11.3001002004 198% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.17 12.4159519038 114% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.94 8.58950901804 116% => OK
difficult_words: 61.0 78.4519038076 78% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 29.0 9.78957915832 296% => Linsear_write_formula is high.
gunning_fog: 21.6 10.1190380762 213% => Gunning_fog is high.
text_standard: 29.0 10.7795591182 269% => The average readability is very high. Good job!
What are above readability scores?

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Minimum 250 words wanted.

Rates: 56.1797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.