chance to alter one important thing about my hometown

Essay topics:

chance to alter one important thing about my hometown

If I have this chance to alter one important thing about my hometown, I rather to make its air better and omit pollute from it. I think contamination is the most important problem for each city and I prefer to modify weather, because by breathing high quality air we have healthier life, more tourists and of course greater amusement.
Having healthier life is probably the primary reason that I like to have pure air for breathing. For example lung disease unfortunately is very common in my hometown and my uncle has this disease too. He has worked in grocery store for 20 years, and he had to travel in city every day and breathed pollute air during these years. If I can refinement my city air I will help many people like my uncle that have to come out every day.
Another equally important reason is that net air makes my city more attractive for tourists. The novel noteworthy investigation conducted by one the most reputable universities in my country has indicated the big decrease in the number of people that chose our city for trip. For instance I have one foreign friend that we communicate by email. I encouraged him, for came to my hometown, Ahvaz, last year, but he was dissuaded only when he read about our weather in internet. So I think changing the air can increase the number of people journey to my hometown.
Last but not least, we have more amusement if our air becomes good. According to the news last week we have a big demonstration in city. People protested because many football games canceled during last year and many other sports such as running and jumping. “We need pure air to have more sports and more amusement” they said. And my official city promises to solve this problem by negotiate with government, but sadly the negotiation so far failed to result in an agreement. Thus if I alter this condition I make many people, city officials and government glad, and resolving this big problem.

As the aforementioned examples illustrated, having better air has many benefits for my hometown and I would decide to change it without any hesitation.

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Average: 6.3 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 331, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...reathed pollute air during these years. If I can refinement my city air I will hel...
^^
Line 4, column 488, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...o far failed to result in an agreement. Thus if I alter this condition I make many p...
^^^^

Discourse Markers used:
['but', 'if', 'so', 'thus', 'for example', 'for instance', 'i think', 'of course', 'such as']

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.243781094527 0.229887763892 106% => OK
Verbs: 0.15671641791 0.158761421928 99% => OK
Adjectives: 0.092039800995 0.0866891130778 106% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0497512437811 0.046263068375 108% => OK
Pronouns: 0.101990049751 0.0685040099705 149% => Less pronouns wanted. Try not to use 'you, I, they, he...' as the subject of a sentence
Prepositions: 0.106965174129 0.118717715034 90% => OK
Participles: 0.0348258706468 0.0351676179071 99% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.68812502278 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0323383084577 0.0309702414327 104% => OK
Particles: 0.00248756218905 0.00188951952338 132% => OK
Determiners: 0.0597014925373 0.0887237588012 67% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.00995024875622 0.0209618222197 47% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.00746268656716 0.0139019557991 54% => OK

Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2098.0 2387.08602151 88% => OK
No of words: 365.0 408.028673835 89% => OK
Chars per words: 5.74794520548 5.86048508987 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.37092360658 4.48200974243 98% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.323287671233 0.338922669872 95% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.230136986301 0.251872472559 91% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.167123287671 0.174417080927 96% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.115068493151 0.112833075102 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.68812502278 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Unique words: 195.0 212.727598566 92% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.534246575342 0.524397521467 102% => OK
Word variations: 58.4257694895 59.2087087015 99% => OK
How many sentences: 18.0 20.6684587814 87% => OK
Sentence length: 20.2777777778 20.5533526081 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 38.0641109605 48.84282405 78% => OK
Chars per sentence: 116.555555556 120.699889404 97% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.2777777778 20.5533526081 99% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.5 0.644075263715 78% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.5376344086 110% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.54480286738 36% => OK
Readability: 43.2914764079 45.7405998639 95% => OK
Elegance: 1.25 1.45489161554 86% => OK

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.262747777733 0.300154397459 88% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.105618654343 0.103427244359 102% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0664279406808 0.0752933317313 88% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.51696337704 0.497263757937 104% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.16087691272 0.151897553556 106% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0990421097039 0.114077575197 87% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.116969002847 0.0781384742642 150% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.263380441222 0.336927656856 78% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0748059275047 0.067059652881 112% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.175082004606 0.210909579961 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0984605338072 0.0618886996521 159% => OK

Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8870967742 109% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.86379928315 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.91756272401 20% => More neutral sentences wanted.
Positive topic words: 10.0 8.42114695341 119% => OK
Negative topic words: 2.0 2.4623655914 81% => OK
Neutral topic words: 0.0 2.75985663082 0% => More neutral topic words wanted.
Total topic words: 12.0 13.6433691756 88% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

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Rates: 63.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 19.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.