Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
The opinions of celebrities, such as famous entertainers and athletes, are more important to younger people than they are to older people.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Celebrities are the influencers of society whose behavior and opinions impact people. Some people believe that reputed human beings impress youngsters more than adults, while the other group thinks otherwise. I, personally, concur with the former group for two main reasons, on which I will elaborate in the following paragraphs.
The first and foremost reason for the above-mentioned notion is that considering the fact that young people seek a role model to accomplish a breakthrough in their career, famous people are the best option, which can change their beliefs and thoughts. To be more specific, celebrities and top athletes have passed a path, which led them to fame and success. As a result, young people who are searching for a way to earn glory and victory in their lifetime may imitate popular people. In this way, juveniles, feel that they became closer to being successful and put their steps in the right way. The grownups, who have already built their career, conversely, hold their own attitude toward life, which cannot easily get altered by reputed people. An example can make this complicated context clearer. When I was at university studying Physical Education as my major, Amir Ghafour, a 24-year-old volleyball player became famous. I used to spend several hours surfing the internet and searching for videos of his plays, practicing similarly. I remember even I went further and I followed his Instagram page, trying to resemble his ideas and thoughts, even if I did not totally agree with them. In this way, I imagined that one day I can become a well-known athlete just like him. On the other hand, the way I behaved back then was not rational for my parents and they did not perceive it. Therefore, I suppose that I, as a young person, was affected more by Amir Ghafor than older people.
The second reason for the aforementioned concept is that lack of knowledge and experience has directed juveniles toward mimicking celebrities. To put it in other words, youngsters do not possess a vast and deep understanding of various issues to take advantage of it, which leaves room for celebrities to be highly influential for them. In this case, if a celebrity makes an advertisement for an organization or a company in exchange for money, juveniles can easily be deceived. In contrast, older expert people depend on their experience and wisdom to decide in different situations rather than the ideas of reputed people. I take my sister as an example to clarify this. About 2 years ago, there was a sunglass company that suddenly flourished. Even though the products of that company were not qualified, young people, including my sister, insisted on purchasing those expensive sunglasses. The reason behind this irrational behavior was that the company invested a huge amount of money in an advertisement by a beloved actor to place its products in the market as the youngsters' choice. However, I remember that most adults assessed the value of those sunglasses and did not buy them. In my opinion, the money that the company spent on its advertisement paid off for the youth and made a great profit.
In sum, famous professionals can impress juveniles because they not only are chosen as role models by young people but also are attractive for naive youngsters to rely on in making decisions.
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| 2023-07-02 | YasamanEsml | 83 | view |
| 2023-07-02 | Vivian Chang | 70 | view |
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- TPO42 80
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, conversely, first, however, if, may, second, similarly, so, then, therefore, well, while, i suppose, in contrast, as a result, in my opinion, in other words, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 15.1003584229 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 13.8261648746 130% => OK
Relative clauses : 21.0 11.0286738351 190% => OK
Pronoun: 62.0 43.0788530466 144% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 60.0 52.1666666667 115% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2767.0 1977.66487455 140% => OK
No of words: 555.0 407.700716846 136% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.98558558559 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.85370353223 4.48103885553 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.76774821107 2.67179642975 104% => OK
Unique words: 301.0 212.727598566 141% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.542342342342 0.524837075471 103% => OK
syllable_count: 871.2 618.680645161 141% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 9.59856630824 63% => OK
Article: 8.0 3.08781362007 259% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 7.0 3.51792114695 199% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 11.0 4.94265232975 223% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 26.0 20.6003584229 126% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 44.8872354387 48.9658058833 92% => OK
Chars per sentence: 106.423076923 100.406767564 106% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.3461538462 20.6045352989 104% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.15384615385 5.45110844103 131% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.5376344086 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.164177280681 0.236089414692 70% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.043210393567 0.076458572812 57% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0331802931482 0.0737576698707 45% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.107437355333 0.150856017488 71% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0303399734579 0.0645574589148 47% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.7 11.7677419355 108% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 58.1214874552 86% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 10.1575268817 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.66 10.9000537634 107% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.72 8.01818996416 109% => OK
difficult_words: 142.0 86.8835125448 163% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.