In this modern era, all the people need the money to survive the harsh and hectic days. Besides, all of us have some responsibility in the society we live in. To be honest, there is a controversional point in which some people believe money is the most important thing they try to achieve, while some others hold the opinion that public recognition is the one they care about. I personally think whether it is ethical or not people care about money most of the times. In what follows, I will explain my view points.
First of all, in these hectic days, people do not have enough time to think about the public recognition and society. Some people even do not have sufficient time to allocate to their family. They try hard to make enough money to spend in thier daily lives. As I can see in my country, Iran, because of huge inflation during last decades, most people do their best attempts days and nights only to make money to satisfy their primary needs. So, when they tolerate this harsh situation, they do not think about the way of making money, they just try to make more and more money in order to make their family and children happy.
Socendly, when we see that a huge company do not do their parts in order to keep society safe and healthy, how can we expect ordinary people to do such a thing? Today, it easily can be seen that a company or an organization do not care about public lives or public health. The main goal of most companies are to make money and being a rich one as soon as possible. In this condition, they indirectly teach their employees to think like them. Moreover these employees will teach their children to do the same. So this process will go on and the money will be the king of the world.
In conclusion, although this kind of thinking make me disappointed, the truth is that money act a pivotal role in this modern life. To have a better society, maybe big companies should care more about people and society and teach them how to act properly in an indirect way.
- The government wants to invest money to develop open space Do you think it is better to build a park to provide entertainment for everyone or to build a sports ground for a high school without a sports field 66
- Some parents offer their school age children money for each high grade mark they get in school Do you think this is a good idea 70
- University recognized first year students have poor study skills in its university Some in the university believe the best way to address this is to ask all first year students have to pass course on study skills Others don t agree with this requirement W 73
- Leadership comes naturally one cannot learn to be a leader 70
- TPO 41 Integrated essay 70
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 442, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Moreover,
...ach their employees to think like them. Moreover these employees will teach their childr...
^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 255, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in an indirect way" with adverb for "indirect"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...iety and teach them how to act properly in an indirect way.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, first, if, may, moreover, so, while, in conclusion, kind of, first of all, in my view
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 15.1003584229 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 9.8082437276 92% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 13.8261648746 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 11.0286738351 63% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 40.0 43.0788530466 93% => OK
Preposition: 50.0 52.1666666667 96% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1638.0 1977.66487455 83% => OK
No of words: 369.0 407.700716846 91% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.43902439024 4.8611393121 91% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.38284983912 4.48103885553 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.30571870488 2.67179642975 86% => OK
Unique words: 178.0 212.727598566 84% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.482384823848 0.524837075471 92% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 520.2 618.680645161 84% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.59856630824 73% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.94265232975 162% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.6003584229 87% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 47.8068709871 48.9658058833 98% => OK
Chars per sentence: 91.0 100.406767564 91% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.5 20.6045352989 99% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.22222222222 5.45110844103 96% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.335576761709 0.236089414692 142% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.106576303809 0.076458572812 139% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0758589454327 0.0737576698707 103% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.214296300456 0.150856017488 142% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0605475778931 0.0645574589148 94% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.7 11.7677419355 82% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 68.1 58.1214874552 117% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 10.1575268817 86% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 8.47 10.9000537634 78% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.07 8.01818996416 88% => OK
difficult_words: 57.0 86.8835125448 66% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.