Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People today spend too much time on personal enjoyment-doing things they like to do-rather than doing things they should do. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Nowadays, exist uncountable ways of distractions, which make our lives more enjoyable and, in some ways, easier. but this coin has another face, there are a lot of individuals that just want to do those activities that they desire, and leaving away those things that they should do. Whether the people are spending more time doing those activities that they love, instead to do those that they should do, though, is a matter of intense debate. As far as I am concerned, I firmly believe that a not minor sector of the society has lost the sense of the responsibility and they are focused on enjoying only. this opinion is based on two main reasons that will be analyzed thoroughly below.
Firstly, the social medias like Facebook, Twitter or YouTube, have become addictive, similar or worse than the drugs. In facts, we just need to see our youngsters to notice that, the majority of them, do not know how to live without their smart phones or laptops. that necessity come from a chemical reaction in their brains, which release Dopamine when they are sailing on the internet, and make them addict to those platforms. Why is this worse than the narcotics addiction? Because this is not forbidden, and today everyone has access to the internet virtually anywhere. Consequently, those teens are more sloped to share a video on YouTube, than to study for their next lesson or prepare hardly to be a solid professional in the future.
Secondly, there is a wave of thought, which has permeated among the teenagers as a whole, that support the “liberty of action” like a form of life. Clearly, they have understood wrongly the concept of freedom as a lack of responsibility, and this may end up being quite detrimental for them. A convincing example of this was a situation that I lived with my nephew Tom 7 years ago. he always had been a mature and serious boy. but one day, we noticed that his attitude toward the school had changed and he just wanted to be from party to party. To make a long history short, when he realized that he was committing a huge mistake, the letter of expulsion from the school had arrived already.
In summation, I am of the opinion that our society shows an unbelievable lack of the responsibility, and they spend a lot of time doing what they want to do instead to do those that they should do, and the signals of this are in front of us. Therefore, my advice is that it is fine to take a break from our everyday life, but we have to know where is the red line that we must not pass.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2020-01-23 | jewel | 73 | view |
| 2020-01-02 | m.shahbazi | 60 | view |
| 2019-12-31 | savikx | 78 | view |
| 2019-12-15 | fafar | 88 | view |
| 2019-12-12 | sandeshbhandari2 | 70 | view |
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- TPO13 - integrated writing task 86
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 114, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: But
...re enjoyable and, in some ways, easier. but this coin has another face, there are a...
^^^
Line 1, column 607, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: This
... and they are focused on enjoying only. this opinion is based on two main reasons th...
^^^^
Line 5, column 265, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: That
... without their smart phones or laptops. that necessity come from a chemical reaction...
^^^^
Line 5, column 457, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'narcotics'' or 'narcotic's'?
Suggestion: narcotics'; narcotic's
...e platforms. Why is this worse than the narcotics addiction? Because this is not forbidde...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 685, Rule ID: ADVERB_WORD_ORDER[9]
Message: The adverb 'hardly' is usually put before the verb 'prepare'.
Suggestion: hardly prepare
... than to study for their next lesson or prepare hardly to be a solid professional in the futur...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 315, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...quite detrimental for them. A convincing example of this was a situation that I l...
^^
Line 9, column 394, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: He
...I lived with my nephew Tom 7 years ago. he always had been a mature and serious bo...
^^
Line 9, column 439, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: But
...ways had been a mature and serious boy. but one day, we noticed that his attitude t...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, consequently, first, firstly, if, may, second, secondly, so, therefore, in fact
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 15.1003584229 139% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 13.8261648746 123% => OK
Relative clauses : 23.0 11.0286738351 209% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 68.0 43.0788530466 158% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 56.0 52.1666666667 107% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 8.0752688172 50% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2083.0 1977.66487455 105% => OK
No of words: 453.0 407.700716846 111% => OK
Chars per words: 4.59823399558 4.8611393121 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.61343653406 4.48103885553 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.59805487575 2.67179642975 97% => OK
Unique words: 245.0 212.727598566 115% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.540838852097 0.524837075471 103% => OK
syllable_count: 660.6 618.680645161 107% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 4.0 3.08781362007 130% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 9.0 1.86738351254 482% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6003584229 92% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 45.7606079614 48.9658058833 93% => OK
Chars per sentence: 109.631578947 100.406767564 109% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.8421052632 20.6045352989 116% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.42105263158 5.45110844103 81% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.5376344086 144% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.309469663516 0.236089414692 131% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0784245413912 0.076458572812 103% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.12384919046 0.0737576698707 168% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.193990078455 0.150856017488 129% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.132002893762 0.0645574589148 204% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.2 11.7677419355 104% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 58.1214874552 97% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.7 10.9000537634 89% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.23 8.01818996416 103% => OK
difficult_words: 99.0 86.8835125448 114% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 10.002688172 140% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 85.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 25.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.