Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Television advertising directed towards young children (aged two to five) should not be allowed.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
In the modern era and the progressive world where we live, advertisement plays a significant role in any kinds of industry in order to introduce their products, and to sell them. The controversial question which arises here is whether television advertising directed toward children should be allowed or not. When it comes to me, I firmly believe that it is a prudent course of action to inhibit them. To support my idea, there are several reasons, two of which I will delve into in the following essay.
First and foremost, advertising on the media specially the television, parents might encounter tremendous difficulties in their lives. To clarify more, unfortunately, media organizations consciously or unconsciously enjoy a variety of cartoon characters in order to exhibit the products that are related directly to the children, without considering the problems they can cause for their parents. Generally speaking, since impressionable adolescents do not possess the foresight to prevent consequences of their choices, it is probably by being exposed to the unlimited advertisements of the media such as television and radio, their penchants for having them intensify, as they seem eye-catching and appealing to them. therefore, parents do not have any choice but to satisfy their demands in order to prevent them from feeling frustrated, which puts a substantial number of financial burdens on them in the current economic climate.
Secondly, government authorities do not control all the advertising due to their preoccupation with money and profits that they can achieve through them; therefore, they can be detrimental for young ages. To be specific, recently many statistics show that advertisements lead to irreversible repercussions for children in many aspects, in the long run. For example, it goes without saying that the most portion of the advertising on the TV specially the ones that directed toward the youth consist of food products like junk foods. Although some of the parents are aware of the harmful effects of these kinds of food for their baby’s health, they have no choice but to buy them, which can take a drastic toll on their future lives owing to having a bad diet that does not contain necessary minerals, proteins, and vitamins for their health. Moreover, psychologists assert that resisting providing children’s desires too many times also ends up suffering many behavior disorders at their adulthood, since children have not the ability to understand the fruits of their decisions.
To wrap it all, not only does advertising result in parents face considerable tribulation, but also it may have dire consequences for the children themselves including mental problems and unhealthy diets. therefore, I believe that governments should make strict rules against advertising products and services, which are related to young children in order to avoid serious troubles.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 721, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Therefore
...eem eye-catching and appealing to them. therefore, parents do not have any choice but to ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 542, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
...food products like junk foods. Although some of the parents are aware of the harmful effect...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 206, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Therefore
...ng mental problems and unhealthy diets. therefore, I believe that governments should make...
^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, may, moreover, second, secondly, so, therefore, for example, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 15.1003584229 73% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 9.8082437276 92% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 11.0286738351 145% => OK
Pronoun: 48.0 43.0788530466 111% => OK
Preposition: 68.0 52.1666666667 130% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2460.0 1977.66487455 124% => OK
No of words: 457.0 407.700716846 112% => OK
Chars per words: 5.3829321663 4.8611393121 111% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.62358717085 4.48103885553 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.02392435057 2.67179642975 113% => OK
Unique words: 258.0 212.727598566 121% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.564551422319 0.524837075471 108% => OK
syllable_count: 747.9 618.680645161 121% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.59856630824 73% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.94265232975 182% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 20.6003584229 73% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 30.0 20.1344086022 149% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 66.7409586053 48.9658058833 136% => OK
Chars per sentence: 164.0 100.406767564 163% => OK
Words per sentence: 30.4666666667 20.6045352989 148% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.0 5.45110844103 110% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 11.8709677419 42% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 3.85842293907 233% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.160108992959 0.236089414692 68% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0639807016096 0.076458572812 84% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0615761684251 0.0737576698707 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.110208052005 0.150856017488 73% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0410244951839 0.0645574589148 64% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 19.1 11.7677419355 162% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 41.03 58.1214874552 71% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 6.10430107527 183% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.0 10.1575268817 148% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.52 10.9000537634 133% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.82 8.01818996416 122% => OK
difficult_words: 136.0 86.8835125448 157% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 10.002688172 115% => OK
gunning_fog: 14.0 10.0537634409 139% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 10.247311828 146% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 85.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 25.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.