The extended family is less important now than it was in the past.
Controversy exists over whether the value of extended family between people. As far as I am concerned, the extended family is less important in comparison to the past because not only people do not have free time but also, the advancement of technology changed the lifestyle. In the following paragraphs, I will pinpoint my case.
The first reason worth mentioning is that members of a family (Father and mother) do not have leisure time and are too busy. In recent years, industrialization happened at a very fast pace. After that, the life of people changes a lot. Some of these changes had more influence on them. People had worked in environments such as societies in the past. However, in modern lives, most jobs position are related and dependant on the industry which make them very difficult with a low income. On the other hand, the daily expenses of people have been increased abnormally and because of that, people are obliged to allocate a great amount of time to work. They do not have enough free time to spend with extended family members and prefer to spend the remaining time with their own family. Hence, people have to focus a great proportion of energy on a career that enables them to supply the need of family members. For example, a person who works in a big company does not earn a high income from his job. He has to get more shifts at the company to increase his earnings to an acceptable amount.
A furthur more subtle point is that the improvement of technology happened. It changes some of people's behavior and caused the emergence of the internet and cell-phone. In the past, people enjoyed spending time with their grandparents. However, in the current situation, teenagers' habit has been changed. Instead of going out with friends or close families, they prefer to use new devices such as computers and cell-phone. One of the most used devices in recent years by teenagers is the mobile. Moreover, a new trend has happened which is social media. Instead of visiting other family members such as cousins and grandparents, children prefer to socialize with their friends on social media such as Instagram or Twitter. Besides that, the artificial intelligence of video games has been improved and made games more difficult and complex with higher quality. Children usually become addicted to this game since it is a great source of entertainment. For instance. when I was in high school, after finishing my study and assignment, instead of going to visit my uncle which loved me very much, my choice was to play games on my computer.
To make a long story short, based on the aforementioned arguments, the extended family does not have significance anymore due to the way people live and the development of technology.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 411, Rule ID: DEPENDENT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'dependent' on?
Suggestion: dependent
...ves, most jobs position are related and dependant on the industry which make them very di...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 968, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: When
... source of entertainment. For instance. when I was in high school, after finishing m...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, first, hence, however, if, moreover, so, as to, for example, for instance, such as, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 15.1003584229 93% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 2.0 9.8082437276 20% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 13.8261648746 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 30.0 43.0788530466 70% => OK
Preposition: 76.0 52.1666666667 146% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 8.0752688172 173% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2285.0 1977.66487455 116% => OK
No of words: 470.0 407.700716846 115% => OK
Chars per words: 4.86170212766 4.8611393121 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.65612321451 4.48103885553 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.692141877 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Unique words: 245.0 212.727598566 115% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.521276595745 0.524837075471 99% => OK
syllable_count: 731.7 618.680645161 118% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 9.59856630824 63% => OK
Article: 10.0 3.08781362007 324% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 13.0 4.94265232975 263% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 26.0 20.6003584229 126% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 46.9879884251 48.9658058833 96% => OK
Chars per sentence: 87.8846153846 100.406767564 88% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.0769230769 20.6045352989 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.65384615385 5.45110844103 85% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8709677419 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 11.0 4.88709677419 225% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.148201018976 0.236089414692 63% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0330563762667 0.076458572812 43% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0562447261795 0.0737576698707 76% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.116031215517 0.150856017488 77% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0820803418917 0.0645574589148 127% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.5 11.7677419355 89% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 53.21 58.1214874552 92% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 10.1575268817 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.61 10.9000537634 97% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.39 8.01818996416 105% => OK
difficult_words: 115.0 86.8835125448 132% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 10.002688172 70% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.