If you could change one important thing about your hometown, what would you change? Use reasons and specific examples to support your answer.

When it comes to the issue of the necessary changes in the hometown, it is quite normal that people have different opinions about it. They may mention the list of their requests which include building a new movie theater, restaurant, school, or even library. As far as I am concerned, fellow-citizens will welcome every positive change in their vicinity but I think the priority is to reform our only park. It would reduce juveniles delinquencies, alleviate the environment issue, and be a proper place for weekends.

First, the one advantage we will gain by improving the local park is filling teenagers' spare time. As long as I remembered, there were several playgrounds, soccer land, and even a long road that is proper for bicycling.

Second, no one can ignore the problem of air pollution especially for people who live in metropolitan cities. So, the local government can allocate some part of the annual budget for planting trees in the park. As a result, plants will absorb a huge amount of harmful nanoparticle and dust. In this way, we can expect a tremendous decreasing the rate of mortality because of the heart attack. Also, we should have a plan to revive the small pool of the park by increasing its water. It would maintain the balance of moisture into the air.

Third, people now are not inclined to spend their leisure time in the park because of the poor infrastructure and addicted people. I think that we can attract people by increasing security and upgrade park facilities.

Taking account of all factors and angles involved in the essential reform in our region, we may conclude that upgrade our park have more edges. Last but not least, I hope that the next generation becomes more socially responsible to preserve public facilities.

Votes
Average: 0.3 (1 vote)
Essay Categories
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, may, second, so, third, i think, as a result

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 7.0 15.1003584229 46% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 13.8261648746 65% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 30.0 43.0788530466 70% => OK
Preposition: 29.0 52.1666666667 56% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1474.0 1977.66487455 75% => OK
No of words: 300.0 407.700716846 74% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.91333333333 4.8611393121 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.16179145029 4.48103885553 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.71756426889 2.67179642975 102% => OK
Unique words: 185.0 212.727598566 87% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.616666666667 0.524837075471 117% => OK
syllable_count: 462.6 618.680645161 75% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 9.59856630824 104% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.94265232975 20% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 20.6003584229 78% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 23.7315717979 48.9658058833 48% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 92.125 100.406767564 92% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.75 20.6045352989 91% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.125 5.45110844103 76% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.5376344086 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 11.8709677419 51% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0504645954037 0.236089414692 21% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.016443341757 0.076458572812 22% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0247969394232 0.0737576698707 34% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0244938894764 0.150856017488 16% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0297543167617 0.0645574589148 46% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.1 11.7677419355 94% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 58.1214874552 106% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 10.1575268817 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.2 10.9000537634 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.79 8.01818996416 110% => OK
difficult_words: 81.0 86.8835125448 93% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.

Rates: 3.33333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.