Nowadays, people are too obsessed with buying and acquiring material things such as expensive clothes because they think that people around them will judge them based on what they possess.
It goes without saying that in this materialistic world, where we live, possessions are the most important part of our lives. There has been a controversial debate among thinkers as to whether people living in the past did not care about their appearance and possessions as much as today's people do. From my perspective, nowadays people are so superficial and materialistic, and two reasons to support my view are presented as follows.
To begin with, by the economic flourish after industrial civilization, people were able to live in affluent societies in which they could buy whatever they wanted. It is not a secret to anyone that poverty prevents people from spending huge amount of their money on unnecessary materials such as expensive watches or a lot of different clothes since they have to meet their basic and important ends. Providing more job opportunities in cities, factories stimulated farmers to send their children to cities or even migrate to metropolitans areas in order to take the advantage of new job to facilitate the way that they were living; having a lot of row material, manufactures could have paid employees more money meaning in addition to fulfilling financial obligation people were able to buy various commodities. As a result people started to show their superiority by dressing differently every day or having expensive furniture in their houses. As you can see, by the decline of poverty rate in recent centuries, people have become vigorous to buy costly objects and to show themselves off.
Furthermore, in the present time, moral concepts and principles have changed over time, thus people have different point of views. It is crystal clear that humans are growing every moment in terms of scientific, religious, culture and so on. Valuable concepts are not exceptions in such alterations since we are witnessing that previous generation and young generation are completely different from each other especially in their beliefs and way of thoughts. I am of the opinion that today's young generation do not appreciate an easy and simple way of living they have more expectations from the world. To put it in more vivid picture, my grandmother told me a story about their lives, according to my grandmother, having a lot of expensive and prohibitive possessions was rude in her time because people especially wealthy ones should have helped poor people instead of buying unnecessary expensive things, they believed that it is the responsibility of the rich to help others in order to make this world a better place for living, by the time this notion have changed. No longer do people care about other individuals. Had my grandmother's belief remained in this time, we would not see such materialistic world.
In sum, not only have people experienced living in prosperity, they have also changed their mind about some disciplines such as helping poor people to escape from the clutches of poverty.
- Movies and television programs should present stories in which good people are rewarded and bad people are punished 73
- For success in school and work the ability to adapt to a changing condition is more important than having excellent knowledge of a job or field to study 95
- Government should provide free access to the internet the individual should access to the internet without paying anything 73
- It is more enjoyable to have a job where you work only 3 days a week for long hours than to have a job where you work 5 days a week for shorter hours 73
- If you get homesick during your trip which of the following activities do you would be beneficial 1 Make new friends in new community 2 Maintain a contact with people in your hometown 3 Try special food in the new community 76
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 180, Rule ID: WHETHER[6]
Message: Can you shorten this phrase to just 'whether', or rephrase the sentence to avoid "as to"?
Suggestion: whether
...n a controversial debate among thinkers as to whether people living in the past did not care ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 188, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...to escape from the clutches of poverty.
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, furthermore, if, so, thus, as to, in addition, such as, as a result, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 9.8082437276 51% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 46.0 43.0788530466 107% => OK
Preposition: 78.0 52.1666666667 150% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2457.0 1977.66487455 124% => OK
No of words: 482.0 407.700716846 118% => OK
Chars per words: 5.09751037344 4.8611393121 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.68556276237 4.48103885553 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.88789302739 2.67179642975 108% => OK
Unique words: 261.0 212.727598566 123% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.541493775934 0.524837075471 103% => OK
syllable_count: 783.0 618.680645161 127% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.94265232975 182% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 20.6003584229 78% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 30.0 20.1344086022 149% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 106.97383953 48.9658058833 218% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 153.5625 100.406767564 153% => OK
Words per sentence: 30.125 20.6045352989 146% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.5 5.45110844103 101% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 11.8709677419 76% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.216421039942 0.236089414692 92% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0766000367514 0.076458572812 100% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0519911573492 0.0737576698707 70% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.142644765423 0.150856017488 95% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0313523124611 0.0645574589148 49% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.7 11.7677419355 150% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 41.03 58.1214874552 71% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 6.10430107527 183% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.0 10.1575268817 148% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.89 10.9000537634 118% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.99 8.01818996416 112% => OK
difficult_words: 118.0 86.8835125448 136% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 10.002688172 140% => OK
gunning_fog: 14.0 10.0537634409 139% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 10.247311828 137% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.