Some parents offer their school age children money for each high grade mark they get in school Do you think this is a good idea

No one can deny that there are both positive and negative aspects of providing incentive for the kids when they got a superb marks in their exams. If I were forced to choose, I would definitely select stimulate children using this way. It is my firm belief kids always need some encoragement to achieve their aims for a number of reasons and I will develop these ideas in the subsequent paragraphs.

To begin with, kids are in a crucial age that needs an enormous support from their parents and the people surrounded them. I have to admit that my opinion on this matter has been profoundly influenced by my own personal experience. Ten years ago, when I was at the school, there were many courses which every student has to take like math, physics, history and biology, so it was hard to keep away with this load. Undoubtedly, there was a high competition between the students and many of them were cleverness. At the first semeter, I got a low grades in many courses this because I do not have any passion to make progress. As a result, in the second semester, my father made a deal with me, so the agreement was if I got any high grade in the exams, he will give me ten dollars for eash mark. It was a stunning incentive for me for study more and prepare for the exams, also I can utilize this money yo purchase possessions like new phone. Consequently, after the end of the semester, the marks were shown and I got high marks in the all materials, so my father did his promise to me and I got one hundred and twenty dollars from him, and I bought new phone. If I had an encoragement in the first part of the year, I would have achieved outstanding marks.

Secondly, this type of aid to the kids may draw a fixed rule in their minds to obtain what they need in the future. If they graduate with high marks they may got a better job with higher salary, or they may got a promotion in the work if they work better. On the other hand, some kids may work by monitoring and they will not get the marks their parent's want if they did not provide incentive for them, in this case this method will not work with them.

In conclusion, I strongly feel that children need this way of encouragement in some cases. This is because kids need someone who direct them to the precise way and can make effect in their thinking in the future to achieve more achievements.

Votes
Average: 7.6 (2 votes)
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 126, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'mark'?
Suggestion: mark
...ive for the kids when they got a superb marks in their exams. If I were forced to cho...
^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, consequently, first, if, may, second, secondly, so, as to, in conclusion, as a result, in some cases, to begin with, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 15.1003584229 93% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 17.0 9.8082437276 173% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 13.8261648746 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 64.0 43.0788530466 149% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 53.0 52.1666666667 102% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1923.0 1977.66487455 97% => OK
No of words: 441.0 407.700716846 108% => OK
Chars per words: 4.36054421769 4.8611393121 90% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.58257569496 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.41687191247 2.67179642975 90% => OK
Unique words: 218.0 212.727598566 102% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.49433106576 0.524837075471 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 606.6 618.680645161 98% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 25.0 20.1344086022 124% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 37.6187393485 48.9658058833 77% => OK
Chars per sentence: 113.117647059 100.406767564 113% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.9411764706 20.6045352989 126% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.23529411765 5.45110844103 151% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.28291769107 0.236089414692 120% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0825704964099 0.076458572812 108% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0428817590754 0.0737576698707 58% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.159787957089 0.150856017488 106% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0282300131907 0.0645574589148 44% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.1 11.7677419355 103% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 63.02 58.1214874552 108% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 8.3 10.9000537634 76% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.67 8.01818996416 96% => OK
difficult_words: 78.0 86.8835125448 90% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 10.002688172 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 10.0537634409 119% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 126, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'mark'?
Suggestion: mark
...ive for the kids when they got a superb marks in their exams. If I were forced to cho...
^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, consequently, first, if, may, second, secondly, so, as to, in conclusion, as a result, in some cases, to begin with, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 15.1003584229 93% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 17.0 9.8082437276 173% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 13.8261648746 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 64.0 43.0788530466 149% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 53.0 52.1666666667 102% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1923.0 1977.66487455 97% => OK
No of words: 441.0 407.700716846 108% => OK
Chars per words: 4.36054421769 4.8611393121 90% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.58257569496 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.41687191247 2.67179642975 90% => OK
Unique words: 218.0 212.727598566 102% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.49433106576 0.524837075471 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 606.6 618.680645161 98% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 25.0 20.1344086022 124% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 37.6187393485 48.9658058833 77% => OK
Chars per sentence: 113.117647059 100.406767564 113% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.9411764706 20.6045352989 126% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.23529411765 5.45110844103 151% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.28291769107 0.236089414692 120% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0825704964099 0.076458572812 108% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0428817590754 0.0737576698707 58% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.159787957089 0.150856017488 106% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0282300131907 0.0645574589148 44% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.1 11.7677419355 103% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 63.02 58.1214874552 108% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 8.3 10.9000537634 76% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.67 8.01818996416 96% => OK
difficult_words: 78.0 86.8835125448 90% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 10.002688172 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 10.0537634409 119% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.