Some people believe that when busy parents do not have a lot of time to spend with their children, the best use of that time is to have fun playing games or sports. Other believe that it is best to use that time doing things together that are related to s

Essay topics:

Some people believe that when busy parents do not have a lot of time to spend with their children, the best use of that time is to have fun playing games or sports. Other believe that it is best to use that time doing things together that are related to schoolwork, which of the two approaches do you prefer?

Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

In today's progressive world we live in, no one can cast a shadow of doubt on the fact that social and educational matters are of utmost importance in people's daily life. Even though some other people assert that the best use of time, when parents are so busy to spend it with their children, is having fun, I claim that the best idea is to spend it with things that are related to schoolwork. It is because of two main reasons, which are going to be explained with examples in the following essay.

In the first place, with this strategy, parents can lead to educational development of their children. In other words, they can both make their children study and spend time with them. By doing this, they will kill two birds by one stone because this method not only contributes to educational development, but also increases the friendship between the family members. An experience in my own life would be an proper example to illustrate the point. When I was 14, my parents, which both have a doctorate degree, hired in a high-tech company. So, they became so busy. But, they chose to go with the strategy we are talking about and due to that, I spent a great time and learned some fantastic lessons.

Another significant reason which should be taken into consideration is that this idea also leads to social development for children. It is proved that the more a person are mingled with others, the better social behavior they would have. Consider a 12 year old teenager. If they solely waste their time with video games or other activities which are done individually, transparently they will not be prosperous in communication with other people.

In conclusion, I am of the opinion that it is better for parents to use their time doing thing are relevant to schoolwork. It is because of development in social behavior and educational matters. I hope this method become a common strategy in our country.

Votes
Average: 6 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
In todays progressive world we live in, ...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ith examples in the following essay. In the first place, with this strategy, ...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 413, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'a' instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
Suggestion: a
.... An experience in my own life would be an proper example to illustrate the point....
^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... and learned some fantastic lessons. Another significant reason which should ...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... in communication with other people. In conclusion, I am of the opinion that ...
^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, so, in conclusion, talking about, in other words, in the first place

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 15.1003584229 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 13.8261648746 51% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.0286738351 127% => OK
Pronoun: 42.0 43.0788530466 97% => OK
Preposition: 46.0 52.1666666667 88% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1585.0 1977.66487455 80% => OK
No of words: 333.0 407.700716846 82% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.75975975976 4.8611393121 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.27180144563 4.48103885553 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.647150128 2.67179642975 99% => OK
Unique words: 183.0 212.727598566 86% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.54954954955 0.524837075471 105% => OK
syllable_count: 495.0 618.680645161 80% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Interrogative: 2.0 0.994623655914 201% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 52.295540244 48.9658058833 107% => OK
Chars per sentence: 93.2352941176 100.406767564 93% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.5882352941 20.6045352989 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.29411764706 5.45110844103 97% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.323157000616 0.236089414692 137% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0917207585892 0.076458572812 120% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.133448710477 0.0737576698707 181% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.204108069848 0.150856017488 135% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.084095143563 0.0645574589148 130% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.8 11.7677419355 92% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 58.1214874552 104% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.33 10.9000537634 95% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.57 8.01818996416 94% => OK
difficult_words: 63.0 86.8835125448 73% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 10.002688172 130% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Try to use less pronouns (like 'It, I, They, We, You...') as the subject of a sentence.
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.