Some people think that it is fine for professional sportsmen and sportswomen to misbehave on or off the field as long as they are playing well To what extent do you agree or disagree | TOEFL IELTS GMAT GRE SAT ACT PTE ESL

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Some people think that it is fine for professional sportsmen and sportswomen to misbehave on or off the field, as long as they are playing well. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There is a view that there is no problem even if professional sports players’ behavior is unfavorable as long as their play in their field is excellent. I completely disagree with this statement.
The main reason why I disagree with the opinion that athletes’ behavior does not matter as long as their play is fantastic is that professional sports players should be an excellent role model for the general public. Their great achievements in their fields are appealing to many people because people can learn from their success stories easily that their hard working and self-control make them successful. It provides fans with a great hope that individuals can also success in their lives and encourages them to work hard on their jobs or study. Therefore, sports players’ misbehaviors disappoint their fans significantly because people feel as if they were told a lie by the athletes. Several years ago, an enthusiastic fans of a Japanese professional baseball player Shinnoske Abe committed a suicide after she knew the news of Abe’s love affair.
Another reason is that their unfavorable behavior can have a negative financial impact. Many companies offer popular sportsmen and sportswomen a financial support on because their popularity and success in sports can give a good impression to customers by utilizing them on their advertisements. This can encourage consumers to buy their products. However, their misbehavior can damage the image of the sponsors considerably, making companies lose an enormous profit. A Japanese professional football player Maezono is a good example of this. After the report of his assault to a taxi driver, his supporting companies, including ASSICS and Nike experienced a significant decrease in sportswear and shoes sales.
In conclusion, although some may argue that sports players’ misbehaviors have no problems if they play well, I believe that it cannot be allowed because it can hurt many people and damage sponsors’ profit.

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2020-02-15	AkiraM	76	view

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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 202, Rule ID: GENERAL_XX[1]
Message: Use simply 'public'.
Suggestion: public
...ould be an excellent role model for the general public. Their great achievements in their fiel...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 725, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'fan'?
Suggestion: fan
...tes. Several years ago, an enthusiastic fans of a Japanese professional baseball pla...
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, however, if, may, so, therefore, thus, well, in conclusion

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 9.8082437276 102% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 13.8261648746 58% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 40.0 43.0788530466 93% => OK
Preposition: 27.0 52.1666666667 52% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 1.0 8.0752688172 12% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1673.0 1977.66487455 85% => OK
No of words: 313.0 407.700716846 77% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.34504792332 4.8611393121 110% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.20616286096 4.48103885553 94% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.99949469558 2.67179642975 112% => OK
Unique words: 176.0 212.727598566 83% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.562300319489 0.524837075471 107% => OK
syllable_count: 508.5 618.680645161 82% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.59856630824 73% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.94265232975 40% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 20.6003584229 68% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 56.4211568366 48.9658058833 115% => OK
Chars per sentence: 119.5 100.406767564 119% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.3571428571 20.6045352989 109% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.57142857143 5.45110844103 84% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.85842293907 156% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.88709677419 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.1223280671 0.236089414692 52% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0456478640383 0.076458572812 60% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0448551002136 0.0737576698707 61% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0954666211783 0.150856017488 63% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0395024828387 0.0645574589148 61% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.9 11.7677419355 127% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 58.1214874552 85% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 10.1575268817 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.05 10.9000537634 129% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.02 8.01818996416 112% => OK
difficult_words: 85.0 86.8835125448 98% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 10.002688172 140% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 10.247311828 146% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.