Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later, and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangers of committing a crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Adolescents are prone to commit a crime if they do not receive a good education from adults. Although a juvenile will not listen easily, it is best for people who have been imprisoned but become good citizens later to talk to teenagers about the dangers of committing an offence. I agree with this opinion because of some rational reasons.
First of all, teenagers usually listen to those who have already undergone a certain situation. This is because they think that they can get some beneficial advice from their “seniors”. Adolescents often suspect the opinions of everyone since they are confused about which advice they should follow. However, they will listen carefully to those who have truly been through the circumstances as they can foresee the results. For example, I usually cast doubt on my parents' warnings against drinking alcohol before legal age; nevertheless, I somehow painstakingly followed my brother’s reminder of not drinking beers after I saw that he was fined by the police since he drank beers at his friend’s party.
Secondly, juveniles tend to believe in used-to-be offenders’ stories. Criminals are the ones who truly know the consequences that they have to face once they break the laws; as a result, they can report in detail all the process and consequences of a crime as well as ways to avoid which can convince teenagers. In contrast, those who did not sail through the problems can solely give cautions by and large that not only cause teenagers to be baffled but also evoke their curiosity. Consequently, they might try out those forbidden activities just to satisfy their curiosity. For instance, there was a boy, who was well-educated, related to nicotine smuggling. His parents did teach him well and also warned him not to get involved in any illegal activities. Nevertheless, they just gave him an overall alarm, so he himself decided to figure out what it would be if he crossed the line. The little boy had been sentenced for two years because of his actions.
In conclusion, I strongly have faith that people who have been sent to prison are the most suitable ones to talk to teenagers about the dangers of committing a crime because they can give juveniles the whole stories in detail and give useful advice which is needed for teenagers.
- the two pie charts below show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in canada in 2005 and 2010
- The plans below show the site of an airport now and how it will look after redevelopment next year Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant 77
- The bar chart below shows the numbers of men and women attending various evening courses at an adult education centre in the year 2009 The pie chart gives information about the ages of these course participants 73
- More and more people want to buy famous brands of clothes cars and other items What are the reasons Do you think it is a positive or negative development 78
- Each year the crime rate increases What are the causes of crime and what could be done to prevent this rise in criminal activity 78
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, first, however, if, nevertheless, second, secondly, so, well, for example, for instance, in conclusion, in contrast, as a result, as well as, by and large, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 15.1003584229 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 9.8082437276 112% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 13.8261648746 43% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.0286738351 136% => OK
Pronoun: 47.0 43.0788530466 109% => OK
Preposition: 50.0 52.1666666667 96% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 8.0752688172 50% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1914.0 1977.66487455 97% => OK
No of words: 386.0 407.700716846 95% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.9585492228 4.8611393121 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.43248042346 4.48103885553 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.71653341844 2.67179642975 102% => OK
Unique words: 210.0 212.727598566 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.544041450777 0.524837075471 104% => OK
syllable_count: 605.7 618.680645161 98% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.94265232975 40% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 69.9371442958 48.9658058833 143% => OK
Chars per sentence: 112.588235294 100.406767564 112% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.7058823529 20.6045352989 110% => OK
Discourse Markers: 11.3529411765 5.45110844103 208% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.5376344086 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 11.8709677419 42% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 11.0 3.85842293907 285% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.235543366547 0.236089414692 100% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.074790041064 0.076458572812 98% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.104634247271 0.0737576698707 142% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.201302311973 0.150856017488 133% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.147979903222 0.0645574589148 229% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.3 11.7677419355 113% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 58.1214874552 85% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 10.1575268817 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.78 10.9000537634 108% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.41 8.01818996416 105% => OK
difficult_words: 90.0 86.8835125448 104% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.