TPO-10 - Independent Writing TaskDo you agree or disagree with the following statement?Playing computer games is a waste of time. Children should not be allowed to play them.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

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TPO-10 - Independent Writing Task
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Playing computer games is a waste of time. Children should not be allowed to play them.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Recent decades has witnessed an unprecedented growth in modern technologies or computer science more specifically. As a result, the price of computer is so accessible that approximately every family in nowadays city can afford to own a computer. besides, computer games have also became more realistic and fascinating and there are increasingly more teenagers addicted to them according to the news. thus, the question is raised that whether adolescents and children should be forbidden from the computer games. From my perspective, they should not be allowed to play video games.

To begin with, playing computer games will decrease their performances in school. For thing, students may not be able to concentrate in what they are learning. because of the games, students’ brain will be filled with something like how be beat that boss, how to make more and better equipment etc. Owing to that reason, students will not follow what teachers is saying. While they are doing their homework, they can not revise the knowledge points taught in the class and may fail their tests. For another, their time of doing homework will be shortened. For example, some games are for players to finish some missions. For these kinds of games, it is impossible for the students to stop half way and the time when the game will be finish is unknown as well, thus students will have no time to finish their homework. With out finishing homework, how can a student get a good mark at school?

In addition, computer games will reduce students time of socializing. because every person have only twenty-four hours a day, if a person want to play video games, his time of finishing other things will be reduced. Among these reduced things, one of the most vital to a teenager is socializing. A teenager who play games all day at home will not go outside and socializing and it is bad for a teenager’s growth.

Furthermore, computer games are bad for a child’s formation of values. what is usually presented in the games are actions and imaginations. Research shows that it is violence that turns most ordinary teenagers into a notorious rogue. besides, the words and sentences used by persons in the games are completely different from what we usually use in daily communication. Consequently, these teenagers will grow up without a precious ability to communicate with others and the ability to precisely express their thoughts. so, these teenagers may grow up alone because they do not how to communicate with others properly and loneliness is the major cause of many mental illnesses or even crimes.

In a nutshell, the demerits of playing video games are so huge that it will enormously affect teenager’s growth in harmful ways. there will not be any other matters that will do more harm to adolescents like computer games can do. I reiterate my standpoint that playing video games should be forbidden from children.

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Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
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2019-08-08 Sepehram 84 view
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 200, Rule ID: IN_NOWADAYS[1]
Message: nowadays is used without 'in'. Use simply: 'nowadays'.
Suggestion: nowadays
...essible that approximately every family in nowadays city can afford to own a computer. besi...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 247, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Besides
...days city can afford to own a computer. besides, computer games have also became more r...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 281, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: 'become'.
Suggestion: become
...uter. besides, computer games have also became more realistic and fascinating and ther...
^^^^^^
Line 1, column 401, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Thus
...addicted to them according to the news. thus, the question is raised that whether ad...
^^^^
Line 7, column 161, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Because
... concentrate in what they are learning. because of the games, students' brain will...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 289, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...t that boss, how to make more and better equipment etc. Owing to that reason, stu...
^^^^
Line 7, column 630, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...re for players to finish some missions. For these kinds of games, it is impossible ...
^^^
Line 7, column 827, Rule ID: WITH_OUT[1]
Message: This word is usually written together. Did you mean 'without'?
Suggestion: Without
... have no time to finish their homework. With out finishing homework, how can a student g...
^^^^^^^^
Line 12, column 71, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Because
...ll reduce students time of socializing. because every person have only twenty-four hour...
^^^^^^^
Line 18, column 77, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: What
...for a child's formation of values. what is usually presented in the games are a...
^^^^
Line 18, column 240, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Besides
...inary teenagers into a notorious rogue. besides, the words and sentences used by person...
^^^^^^^
Line 18, column 526, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: So
...ty to precisely express their thoughts. so, these teenagers may grow up alone beca...
^^
Line 24, column 135, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: There
...teenager's growth in harmful ways. there will not be any other matters that will...
^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, consequently, furthermore, if, may, so, thus, well, while, for example, in addition, as a result, to begin with

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 15.1003584229 185% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 23.0 9.8082437276 234% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 34.0 43.0788530466 79% => OK
Preposition: 59.0 52.1666666667 113% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2476.0 1977.66487455 125% => OK
No of words: 486.0 407.700716846 119% => OK
Chars per words: 5.09465020576 4.8611393121 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.69525374022 4.48103885553 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.82697179811 2.67179642975 106% => OK
Unique words: 242.0 212.727598566 114% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.497942386831 0.524837075471 95% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 765.0 618.680645161 124% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.94265232975 162% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 20.6003584229 131% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 36.8141813792 48.9658058833 75% => OK
Chars per sentence: 91.7037037037 100.406767564 91% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.0 20.6045352989 87% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.66666666667 5.45110844103 86% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 13.0 5.5376344086 235% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 3.85842293907 233% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.187796363513 0.236089414692 80% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0624922717612 0.076458572812 82% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0516113025094 0.0737576698707 70% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.120194248197 0.150856017488 80% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0396312831482 0.0645574589148 61% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.5 11.7677419355 98% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 53.21 58.1214874552 92% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 10.1575268817 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.95 10.9000537634 110% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.84 8.01818996416 98% => OK
difficult_words: 102.0 86.8835125448 117% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 10.002688172 90% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.