TPO-14 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People benefit more from traveling in their own country than from traveling to foreign countries.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Submitted by darbast on Sat, 11/10/2018 - 23:05

Traveling is one of the most important tasks that human perform from the early ages. Human beings initially travel for finding foods and accommodation. However this need and tendency changes progressively. Nowadays, people traveling as businesses and leisure. This traveling may be short distance or long distance. Some people think the benefit more from traveling in their own country than from traveling to foreign countries, others disagree. Even though traveling in your own country is more economical, in my view, traveling abroad is more beneficial than inner country trips because of two important reasons.

First, people by traveling to other countries will learn the culture of there. There is a wide variety of cultures worldwide. Culture can be classified to other meanings. It may be the cuisine of the country, the language that they speak together with, clothes that they wear in the city, and ceremonies they have in a specific time of the year. For example, last summer me and my wife went to Kuala Lumpur in east Asia. People in the city are consists of three races, which are Chinese, Indian and Malaysian. Even this difference is not making them be separate from each other, it also blends them to a more exotic and synthesis society. Therefore, we decided to test the cuisine of the city, which was precedented to us and so interesting. First, we try Indian food which was too hot and delicious. Then we went to a Chinese noodle restaurant and find out that we hate those watery soups they refer it as noodles. Finally, we test some Malaysian food which the rice was cooked on coconut milk and it was perfect. After our trip, we feel fulfilled about it, because we learned about the culture and the diversity of food tastes.

Second, for an individual, the earth is vast enough to roam and wander around it, and never get tired from this adventure. Except if you are from a big country like Russia, China, or united states of America, your homeland is small. Even if you do not see all the places in there, you should be sure that other parts that you did not see are akin to places you have observed before. For instance, there are many people who live as a backpacker. Backpackers' goal is to live in a budget and travel the planet earth and spend their money wisely. They are not like tourists who squander their money on expensive hotels and restaurants abroad. Among this backpackers who dedicated to the adventure, there is still a few numbers of them who traveled to all the continents and all the famous and ordinary landmarks in the world. This shows that how much a person tries, there are still many places to visit and enjoy. Hence, the best way is to pack your backpack and bring your passport, then go to another country for a nice trip.

As we can see, traveling in foreign countries has more benefit than traveling in own homeland, because there is a vast unforgettable places in the world to undergo and with this experience, you can be ready to progress in your life with more hope and goal.

Votes
Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
Essay Categories
Independent TOEFL Writing
Essays by the user:
>>> more essays by the user >>>

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 153, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
...el for finding foods and accommodation. However this need and tendency changes progress...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 646, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...ve hotels and restaurants abroad. Among this backpackers who dedicated to the advent...
^^^^
Line 7, column 134, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'place'?
Suggestion: place
..., because there is a vast unforgettable places in the world to undergo and with this e...
^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, finally, first, hence, however, if, may, second, so, still, then, therefore, as to, for example, for instance, in my view

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 15.1003584229 185% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 25.0 13.8261648746 181% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.0286738351 136% => OK
Pronoun: 56.0 43.0788530466 130% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 66.0 52.1666666667 127% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2507.0 1977.66487455 127% => OK
No of words: 531.0 407.700716846 130% => OK
Chars per words: 4.72128060264 4.8611393121 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.80035803286 4.48103885553 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.48224925233 2.67179642975 93% => OK
Unique words: 273.0 212.727598566 128% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.514124293785 0.524837075471 98% => OK
syllable_count: 783.0 618.680645161 127% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 29.0 20.6003584229 141% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 47.2559252713 48.9658058833 97% => OK
Chars per sentence: 86.4482758621 100.406767564 86% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.3103448276 20.6045352989 89% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.37931034483 5.45110844103 80% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 12.0 4.88709677419 246% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.300488532505 0.236089414692 127% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0729971295952 0.076458572812 95% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0983196155682 0.0737576698707 133% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.20934451922 0.150856017488 139% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.116288796909 0.0645574589148 180% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.0 11.7677419355 85% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 58.1214874552 106% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 10.1575268817 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.1 10.9000537634 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.07 8.01818996416 101% => OK
difficult_words: 119.0 86.8835125448 137% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.0 10.002688172 60% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.