TPO-17 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Most advertisements make products seem much better then they really are.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
With advancement of technology new products are going to invent and manufacture. A great deals of these new things are publicized through the media including TV, newspapers and so forth. This brings us an arguable question whether advertisements make products seem better than real products or not. As far as I'm concerned, I think that it is a true fact that commercials make products looks better to our eyes. The reasons for this standpoint are discussed in the following essay.
To begin with, advertisers show products that is not same as in the real. In fact, advertisers sometimes publicize foods and eatable products such as cakes or chocolates that are bigger than the real packages. For example, television advertisement show a chocolates that are similar to size of an apple, while after the opening its package, it is smaller than that of television advertisement. Additionally, magazine commercials introduce products unrealistically, which for instance show a person eating a fruit who like to eat them because of having extraordinary taste. However, this is not real in the taste of fruits and the advertisers deceive people in this way in order to earn a lot of money from selling them. Therefore, making a products looks better to sell things that is not real for their products.
The second reason why I think that advertisements make a product seem better than real one is that commercials represent products that have superior quality. In fact, commercials, most of the time, show things such as kitchen knife by stating that their knife could easily cut several cereals and potatoes simultaneously, however, the advertised kitchen furniture do not have same strength as the television represents. Moreover, commercial advertisement broadcast industrial tools such as hammers by claiming that it can hit the iron without causing any damage to tool or without breaking the tool, while such the aftermentioned tool do not have that property, which advertiser presents. All of these advertisements conceal products qualities by showing that their goods do not have inferior quality, rather they create an image of higher quality in the customer in order to sell their products.
In conclusion, according the above-mentioned reasons, I would say that most of advertisements which are exhibited at television, newspapers and magazines make products appear much better than they are in real because advertisers sell merchandizes that are not same as they shows at TV and because they sell product with inferior properties. How you believe in the things that are publicized to you?
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 310, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: I'm
...er than real products or not. As far as Im concerned, I think that it is a true fa...
^^
Line 2, column 253, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'a chocolate' or simply 'chocolates'?
Suggestion: a chocolate; chocolates
... example, television advertisement show a chocolates that are similar to size of an apple, w...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 72, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'most of', you should use 'the' ('most of the advertisements') or simply say ''most advertisements''.
Suggestion: most of the advertisements; most advertisements
...ove-mentioned reasons, I would say that most of advertisements which are exhibited at television, news...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 274, Rule ID: NON3PRS_VERB[2]
Message: The pronoun 'they' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: 'show'
Suggestion: show
... merchandizes that are not same as they shows at TV and because they sell product wit...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
however, if, look, moreover, second, so, therefore, while, for example, for instance, i think, in conclusion, in fact, such as, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 9.8082437276 31% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 21.0 11.0286738351 190% => OK
Pronoun: 44.0 43.0788530466 102% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 52.1666666667 92% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2182.0 1977.66487455 110% => OK
No of words: 417.0 407.700716846 102% => OK
Chars per words: 5.23261390887 4.8611393121 108% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.5189133491 4.48103885553 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.05269656955 2.67179642975 114% => OK
Unique words: 211.0 212.727598566 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.505995203837 0.524837075471 96% => OK
syllable_count: 665.1 618.680645161 108% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 9.59856630824 52% => OK
Article: 4.0 3.08781362007 130% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 24.0 20.1344086022 119% => OK
Sentence length SD: 77.4893228497 48.9658058833 158% => OK
Chars per sentence: 128.352941176 100.406767564 128% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.5294117647 20.6045352989 119% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.29411764706 5.45110844103 152% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 11.8709677419 76% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.21549945086 0.236089414692 91% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0786872981968 0.076458572812 103% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0550579979287 0.0737576698707 75% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.150374666791 0.150856017488 100% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0411537963935 0.0645574589148 64% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.5 11.7677419355 132% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 58.1214874552 81% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 6.10430107527 183% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 10.1575268817 125% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.35 10.9000537634 122% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.01 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 84.0 86.8835125448 97% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 10.002688172 70% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.0537634409 115% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.247311828 127% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.