By and large, it is established beyond doubt that parents should teach their child how to live and act. It gets more significant as the child's age increases. Therefore, parents should always devise a new procedure to enhance the possibility of prosperity in their child. Some people may hold the view that parents should encourage their teenage children to take a part-time job and prepare for their adulthood. However, some others may take an opposite viewpoint and believe that it is too soon for a teenager to work, and he should play computer games and other kinds of stuff. In my perspective, They should motivate them to take jobs. In the following paragraphs, I will delve into the most outstanding reasons.
The most significant reason is that the children will gain experience form their job. By experiencing techniques and skills, they become adapted and it actually helps them in their job life further in adult ages. As an example, one of my classmates in elementary school worked with his dad as a trainee in a restaurant. Years later, he established one of the most prominent fast-food chains in Tehran. In conclusion, experiences are key factors for an individual's future career.
Another reason which deserves some words is that they actually make money. Earning a steady amount of salary monthly, teaches them how to manage it and not squander their wealth, how to be dependent and independent from parents pocket, and approach their wishes wisely. In my own experience, my father always forced me to work. Besides the fact that forcing a child to do what is undesired for him, it actually assisted me to accumulate a good portion of the money. In addition, I married in young age, which is successful. After many years, I am still unsurpassed among my friends that do not save their money or work as a teenager. This example shows that working and learning how to manage money will improve a child's life in young and old ages.
Although the aforementioned reasons are the first ones which cross the mind at first glance, they are by no means the only reasons available. In fact, there is another subtle point which must be borne in mind. The reason is that teenagers will make friends in their workplace. However, these friends are not their naive and childish classmates, they are more mature. Mature colleagues will teach adolescences important lessons in life. To illustrate this vividly, when I worked as a teenager, I acquaintances with so many wise people, which gives me some strong advices about life and how to flourish in it.
To wrap it up, parents should contemplate the consequences of part-time job stimulation for their children, which are beneficial for both of them. Deliberating all the aforementioned reasons one soon realize that taking part in jobs for teenagers has benefits as following: gaining experience, earning money, and making friends and relationships with sophisticated people. Therefore, it is highly recommended that schools have some seminars for parents to persuade them for encouraging their children to take part-time jobs. In the end, parents should not compel their teenagers because it has major effects which will affect the child's life in a detrimental way.
- TOEFL TPO 09 - Integrated Writing Task 80
- TPO-13 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The extended family (grandparents, cousins, aunts, and uncles) is less important now than it was in the past.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. 73
- TOEFL TPO 13 - Integrated Writing Task 80
- TPO-24 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?One of the best ways that parents can help their teenage children prepare for adult life is to encourage them to take a part-time job.Use specific reasons and examples 73
- TPO-23 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? In today’s world, it is more important to work quickly and risk making mistakes than to work slowly and make sure that everything is correct.Use specific reasons an 73
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 71, Rule ID: FROM_FORM[4]
Message: Did you mean 'from'?
Suggestion: from
... that the children will gain experience form their job. By experiencing techniques a...
^^^^
Line 3, column 450, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'an individual' or simply 'individuals'?
Suggestion: an individual; individuals
...lusion, experiences are key factors for an individuals future career. Another reason which ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 643, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a detrimental way" with adverb for "detrimental"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...fects which will affect the childs life in a detrimental way.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, besides, first, however, if, may, so, still, therefore, in addition, in conclusion, in fact, by and large
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 15.1003584229 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 9.8082437276 163% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 13.8261648746 130% => OK
Relative clauses : 19.0 11.0286738351 172% => OK
Pronoun: 65.0 43.0788530466 151% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 61.0 52.1666666667 117% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2695.0 1977.66487455 136% => OK
No of words: 536.0 407.700716846 131% => OK
Chars per words: 5.02798507463 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.81161862636 4.48103885553 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.77212878702 2.67179642975 104% => OK
Unique words: 277.0 212.727598566 130% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.516791044776 0.524837075471 98% => OK
syllable_count: 821.7 618.680645161 133% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 16.0 9.59856630824 167% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 13.0 4.94265232975 263% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 29.0 20.6003584229 141% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 44.146874094 48.9658058833 90% => OK
Chars per sentence: 92.9310344828 100.406767564 93% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.4827586207 20.6045352989 90% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.96551724138 5.45110844103 73% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 20.0 11.8709677419 168% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.300617081802 0.236089414692 127% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0757856389437 0.076458572812 99% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0734302759759 0.0737576698707 100% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.174391989315 0.150856017488 116% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0853387338589 0.0645574589148 132% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.5 11.7677419355 98% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 58.1214874552 106% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 10.1575268817 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.89 10.9000537634 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.27 8.01818996416 103% => OK
difficult_words: 127.0 86.8835125448 146% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.