TPO-31- Independent Writing Task
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Because the world is changing so quickly, people now are less happy or less satisfied with their lives than people were in the past
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Today we all are living in a fast-moving twenty-first century. This twenty-first century is the era of technological innovation, and now we have more facilities compare to the people in the past. Although some people believe that people in the past, had a very simple life, and so they were more happy than us today, I disagree with this view. I believe that today, we are happier than people were in the past. I have some reasons to follow my viewpoint.
First, I believe that heath is the first wealth, and a healthy person is considered the happiest person in his world. Today, an excellent medical facility is available everywhere, even the smallest town has a government medical hospital to take care of poor people. Inventions of antibiotics, diagnostic tools and procedures, and because of expert doctors, the mortality and morbidity rate has been reduced all over in the world. People are living healthier, longer and satisfactory life compare to past. Recently I read one medical journal presenting the data of average life expectancy which has increased from 67 to 76years.
Second, today, we have more facilities in our life, like we have air-conditioner, heater, washing machine, dishwasher, microwave and oven at our home. We have water purifier machines with us. Because of all these tools, physical stress has been reduced in our routine life and hence our life has become easier and comfortable.
Finally, today, we have more fun and entertainment in our life compare to people of past. We have large t.v, home theater, and music system at home to relax our own selves. As present-day, people have easy and fast transportation; people can go out to enjoy their vacations. People in the past generally used to go to relatives place to enjoy their vacation, for example, I remember that when I was a child, at that time I usually went to my maternal uncle’s place each summer vacation. I never visited beautiful tourist places. Recently, in California, I see lots of people from all around the world in the summer vacation. Now, people are more educated than people in the past, so have more money for the entertainment, clothes and food. Today, we eat varieties of fruits and dry fruits daily, as we know the importance of all these things in our life, moreover, we can afford to buy them for our family. People in the past had very limited income, and so they had fruits when someone in the family had some health issues or advised by a doctor.
In a nutshell, in a quickly changing world, as people are living a healthier, happier life with fun and satisfaction, it is wrong to say that today people are less happy or satisfied in their life than people were in the past.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2019-10-09 | raniamekhaiel | 70 | view |
| 2020-10-12 | ranadanesh72 | 80 | view |
| 2020-01-26 | Somayya | 70 | view |
| 2020-01-27 | Somayya | 76 | view |
| 2019-11-04 | M.S 2019 | 73 | view |
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
and now we have more facilities compare to the people in the past.
and now we have more facilities compared to the people in the past.
Sentence: Today, an excellent medical facility is available everywhere, even the smallest town has a government medical hospital to take care of poor people.
Description: A noun, singular, common is not usually followed by an adjective
Suggestion: Refer to government and medical
we have more fun and entertainment in our life compare to people of past.
we have more fun and entertainment in our life compared to people of past.
flaws:
No. of Words: 466 while No. of Different Words: 220
More compound or complex sentences/clauses wanted. Try not to use pronouns like 'you, I, they...' or 'people'as the subject of a sentence.
Always add a blank line between paragraphs.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 21 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 23 15
No. of Words: 466 350
No. of Characters: 2152 1500
No. of Different Words: 220 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.646 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.618 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.584 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 149 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 100 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 62 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 42 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.261 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.199 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.391 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.352 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.352 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.187 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Thanks for your suggestions,
Thanks for your suggestions, here eassy is about the people- then what shoud I write as a subject instead of people/ other pronouns????
1. Try not to user personal
1. Try not to user personal experience as examples, then you can remove a lot of sentences starting with pronouns, like:
for example, I remember that when I was a child, at that time I usually went to my maternal uncle’s place each summer vacation. I never visited beautiful tourist places. Recently, in California, I see lots of people from all around the world in the summer vacation.
2. Try to user object as subject (like passive voice), for example:
before:
Now, people are more educated than people in the past, so have more money for the entertainment, clothes and food.
revised:
More entertainment, clothes and food are available as more money can be earned by those who are more educated nowadays.
3. Reading some professional articles will help to develop better sentences, like from New York times.
4. Keep it in mind and do more practice.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 124, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...the happiest person in his world. Today, an excellent medical facility is availab...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 259, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...government medical hospital to take care of poor people. Inventions of antibiotic...
^^
Line 2, column 351, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...tic tools and procedures, and because of expert doctors, the mortality and morbi...
^^
Line 2, column 368, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...cedures, and because of expert doctors, the mortality and morbidity rate has be...
^^
Line 2, column 397, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...rt doctors, the mortality and morbidity rate has been reduced all over in the wo...
^^
Line 5, column 197, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...re less happy or satisfied in their life than people were in the past.
^^
Discourse Markers used:
['finally', 'first', 'hence', 'if', 'moreover', 'second', 'so', 'for example']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.253731343284 0.229887763892 110% => OK
Verbs: 0.138059701493 0.158761421928 87% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0876865671642 0.0866891130778 101% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0429104477612 0.046263068375 93% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0764925373134 0.0685040099705 112% => OK
Prepositions: 0.111940298507 0.118717715034 94% => OK
Participles: 0.0298507462687 0.0351676179071 85% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.73192776226 2.67179642975 102% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0261194029851 0.0309702414327 84% => OK
Particles: 0.00186567164179 0.00188951952338 99% => OK
Determiners: 0.0783582089552 0.0887237588012 88% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.00373134328358 0.0209618222197 18% => Some modal verbs wanted.
WH_determiners: 0.00559701492537 0.0139019557991 40% => Some subClauses wanted starting by 'Which, Who, What, Whom, Whose.....'
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2712.0 2387.08602151 114% => OK
No of words: 465.0 408.028673835 114% => OK
Chars per words: 5.83225806452 5.86048508987 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.64369019777 4.48200974243 104% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.348387096774 0.338922669872 103% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.234408602151 0.251872472559 93% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.150537634409 0.174417080927 86% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.105376344086 0.112833075102 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.73192776226 2.67179642975 102% => OK
Unique words: 227.0 212.727598566 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.488172043011 0.524397521467 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
Word variations: 55.6226372509 59.2087087015 94% => OK
How many sentences: 23.0 20.6684587814 111% => OK
Sentence length: 20.2173913043 20.5533526081 98% => OK
Sentence length SD: 50.7752377021 48.84282405 104% => OK
Chars per sentence: 117.913043478 120.699889404 98% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.2173913043 20.5533526081 98% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.347826086957 0.644075263715 54% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.5376344086 110% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.54480286738 108% => OK
Readability: 43.6582515194 45.7405998639 95% => OK
Elegance: 1.53623188406 1.45489161554 106% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.378051608881 0.300154397459 126% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.111896061695 0.103427244359 108% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.104009968997 0.0752933317313 138% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.490740018398 0.497263757937 99% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.185839121919 0.151897553556 122% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.135783868465 0.114077575197 119% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.100193858101 0.0781384742642 128% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.310692786257 0.336927656856 92% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0830284972264 0.067059652881 124% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.261249030952 0.210909579961 124% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.118379064532 0.0618886996521 191% => OK
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 11.8870967742 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.86379928315 52% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.91756272401 102% => OK
Positive topic words: 15.0 8.42114695341 178% => OK
Negative topic words: 0.0 2.4623655914 0% => More negative topic words wanted.
Neutral topic words: 3.0 2.75985663082 109% => OK
Total topic words: 18.0 13.6433691756 132% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
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Rates: 75.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.5 Out of 30
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.