TPO 35 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement Famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy than they have now Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

Essay topics:

TPO 35: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Famous entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy than they have now. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Privacy is considered as one of the critical requirements for individuals. The question is whether entertainers and athletes deserve to have more privacy or not. Basically, famouse people need higher level of privacy as their reputation defines their prosperous life. As they are more prone to be harassed and their private information has more value than ordinary people, and to make safe environment for their family, providing more privacy for them seems momentous.
As a threshold matter, admired by people, those rich famous entertainers and athletes are always under observation of large number of people. Body gaurds and other safty tool are imposed to take care of their life and assets. According to troubles that may occur for these famous people, more private environment is remarked as necessity so as to keep their life safe.
Furthermore, what pretends to be different in the lives of such a famous people is that many people follow their small events of their routine lives continuously.Thus, their personal information has more value comparing with ordinary people. Creating privacy not only inhibits the spread of information athletes and entertainers do not want to be reveald, but it promotes more credit for them when they broadcast fresh news that nobody had heared before.
Last but not least, famous artists and players, like other humans, need a calm and safe place for their families. While many may believe that fame is the most success in ones' life, those famous artists deliberate family safety as the significant factor in life. Increasing the level of privacy, famous ones become able to provide more achievements for their society.
As a conclusion, privacy as a critical element should be provided in every ones' life particularly the well-known individuals to inhibit any problems to their life, to take care of their information and provide a safe dwelling for their families.

Votes
Average: 7 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 339, Rule ID: SO_AS_TO[1]
Message: Use simply 'to'
Suggestion: to
...te environment is remarked as necessity so as to keep their life safe. Furthermore, wh...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 163, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Thus
...nts of their routine lives continuously.Thus, their personal information has more va...
^^^^
Line 4, column 122, Rule ID: MANY_NN_U[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun may seems to be uncountable; consider using: 'much may', 'a good deal of may'.
Suggestion: much may; a good deal of may
...nd safe place for their families. While many may believe that fame is the most success i...
^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 172, Rule ID: ONES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
...elieve that fame is the most success in ones life, those famous artists deliberate f...
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, furthermore, if, may, so, thus, well, while, as to

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 9.8082437276 51% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 13.8261648746 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 11.0286738351 45% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 26.0 43.0788530466 60% => OK
Preposition: 31.0 52.1666666667 59% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 10.0 8.0752688172 124% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1606.0 1977.66487455 81% => OK
No of words: 308.0 407.700716846 76% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.21428571429 4.8611393121 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.18926351222 4.48103885553 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.77575187081 2.67179642975 104% => OK
Unique words: 164.0 212.727598566 77% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.532467532468 0.524837075471 101% => OK
syllable_count: 522.9 618.680645161 85% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.51630824373 112% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 9.59856630824 31% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 20.6003584229 63% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 57.7961117424 48.9658058833 118% => OK
Chars per sentence: 123.538461538 100.406767564 123% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.6923076923 20.6045352989 115% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.23076923077 5.45110844103 78% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 11.8709677419 76% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.149782885622 0.236089414692 63% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0700465772862 0.076458572812 92% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0721405467508 0.0737576698707 98% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0901961055389 0.150856017488 60% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0620394827018 0.0645574589148 96% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.0 11.7677419355 127% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 39.67 58.1214874552 68% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 10.1575268817 132% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.23 10.9000537634 121% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.67 8.01818996416 108% => OK
difficult_words: 76.0 86.8835125448 87% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 10.002688172 90% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200

Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.