TPO-37- Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Many people nowadays spend too much money on their pets (dogs, cats, or other animals), although there are better uses for this money.Use specific reasons and example
All of us have different responsibility to do. These responsiblity are imposed by families, society and jobs. Some people believe that doing many different things can lead to do very few things well; others assume otherwise. In my opinion, I support the former groups because of two reasons.
First, doing many different things can increase making mistakes. When you do many things, you do not have enough concentration because it is usually hard to shift our minds from one subject to another in a very short time. So when you are doing a new job, your mind is preocuppied with the previous job. For example, when I was at university, I had to work and study simeltaneously because of the university's fee. In the first semester, my grades were awlfull, and I turned down by my boss, complaining making a lot of mistakes. In the following semester, I decided to work only in the summer breakes. As a result, I increased my grades and obtained a good income with many bonuses.
Second, doing many jobs can cause tiredness. When you do many things, you lose a tremendous amount of energy becasue of changing concetration. And stududies have shown when we are tired, our body does not react properly. For instance, my brother in law is a doctor. He is fighting in different part of life to provide a better life for his children. He works in a company as a doctor, while he works as an accountant in another company. He also cultivate different trees and vegetable in his orchard. Two years ago, he had a bad car crash when he was coming back from the orchard. The police declared that main reason of accindent was my brother in law's tiredness. So, doing many jobs can cause tiredness.
In conclusion, I believe that doing so many different things can lead to do very few things well because it increase making mistakes and tiredness.
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Comments
Essay evaluations by e-grader
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 142, Rule ID: NUMEROUS_DIFFERENT[1]
Message: Use simply 'many'.
Suggestion: many
...nd jobs. Some people believe that doing many different things can lead to do very few things w...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 14, Rule ID: NUMEROUS_DIFFERENT[1]
Message: Use simply 'many'.
Suggestion: many
...s because of two reasons. First, doing many different things can increase making mistakes. Wh...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 238, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: brother-in-law
...es not react properly. For instance, my brother in law is a doctor. He is fighting in differen...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 437, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...ks as an accountant in another company. He also cultivate different trees and vege...
^^
Line 3, column 445, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[3]
Message: The pronoun 'He' must be used with a third-person verb: 'cultivates'.
Suggestion: cultivates
... accountant in another company. He also cultivate different trees and vegetable in his or...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 524, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... in his orchard. Two years ago, he had a bad car crash when he was coming back fr...
^^
Line 4, column 40, Rule ID: NUMEROUS_DIFFERENT[1]
Message: Use simply 'many'.
Suggestion: many
... In conclusion, I believe that doing so many different things can lead to do very few things w...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 97, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ings can lead to do very few things well because it increase making mistakes and...
^^
Line 4, column 110, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'increases'?
Suggestion: increases
... to do very few things well because it increase making mistakes and tiredness.
^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 134, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ell because it increase making mistakes and tiredness.
^^
Line 4, column 150, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ncrease making mistakes and tiredness.
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, if, second, so, well, while, for example, for instance, in conclusion, as a result, in my opinion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 15.1003584229 73% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 9.8082437276 51% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 13.8261648746 51% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 37.0 43.0788530466 86% => OK
Preposition: 36.0 52.1666666667 69% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.0752688172 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1512.0 1977.66487455 76% => OK
No of words: 323.0 407.700716846 79% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.68111455108 4.8611393121 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.23936324884 4.48103885553 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.72257886208 2.67179642975 102% => OK
Unique words: 170.0 212.727598566 80% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.526315789474 0.524837075471 100% => OK
syllable_count: 479.7 618.680645161 78% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 16.0 9.59856630824 167% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 14.0 20.1344086022 70% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 30.5691196206 48.9658058833 62% => OK
Chars per sentence: 68.7272727273 100.406767564 68% => OK
Words per sentence: 14.6818181818 20.6045352989 71% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.0 5.45110844103 92% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 11.0 5.5376344086 199% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 11.8709677419 42% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 3.85842293907 181% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.88709677419 205% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.121624922029 0.236089414692 52% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0386884599185 0.076458572812 51% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0328200341428 0.0737576698707 44% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0787824433364 0.150856017488 52% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0179532189813 0.0645574589148 28% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 8.0 11.7677419355 68% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 65.73 58.1214874552 113% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.6 10.1575268817 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.27 10.9000537634 85% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.17 8.01818996416 89% => OK
difficult_words: 58.0 86.8835125448 67% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 10.002688172 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 7.6 10.0537634409 76% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 142, Rule ID: NUMEROUS_DIFFERENT[1]
Message: Use simply 'many'.
Suggestion: many
...nd jobs. Some people believe that doing many different things can lead to do very few things w...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 14, Rule ID: NUMEROUS_DIFFERENT[1]
Message: Use simply 'many'.
Suggestion: many
...s because of two reasons. First, doing many different things can increase making mistakes. Wh...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 238, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: brother-in-law
...es not react properly. For instance, my brother in law is a doctor. He is fighting in differen...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 437, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...ks as an accountant in another company. He also cultivate different trees and vege...
^^
Line 3, column 445, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[3]
Message: The pronoun 'He' must be used with a third-person verb: 'cultivates'.
Suggestion: cultivates
... accountant in another company. He also cultivate different trees and vegetable in his or...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 524, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... in his orchard. Two years ago, he had a bad car crash when he was coming back fr...
^^
Line 4, column 40, Rule ID: NUMEROUS_DIFFERENT[1]
Message: Use simply 'many'.
Suggestion: many
... In conclusion, I believe that doing so many different things can lead to do very few things w...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 97, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ings can lead to do very few things well because it increase making mistakes and...
^^
Line 4, column 110, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'increases'?
Suggestion: increases
... to do very few things well because it increase making mistakes and tiredness.
^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 134, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ell because it increase making mistakes and tiredness.
^^
Line 4, column 150, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ncrease making mistakes and tiredness.
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, if, second, so, well, while, for example, for instance, in conclusion, as a result, in my opinion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 15.1003584229 73% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 9.8082437276 51% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 13.8261648746 51% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 37.0 43.0788530466 86% => OK
Preposition: 36.0 52.1666666667 69% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.0752688172 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1512.0 1977.66487455 76% => OK
No of words: 323.0 407.700716846 79% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.68111455108 4.8611393121 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.23936324884 4.48103885553 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.72257886208 2.67179642975 102% => OK
Unique words: 170.0 212.727598566 80% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.526315789474 0.524837075471 100% => OK
syllable_count: 479.7 618.680645161 78% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 16.0 9.59856630824 167% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 14.0 20.1344086022 70% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 30.5691196206 48.9658058833 62% => OK
Chars per sentence: 68.7272727273 100.406767564 68% => OK
Words per sentence: 14.6818181818 20.6045352989 71% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.0 5.45110844103 92% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 11.0 5.5376344086 199% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 11.8709677419 42% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 3.85842293907 181% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.88709677419 205% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.121624922029 0.236089414692 52% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0386884599185 0.076458572812 51% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0328200341428 0.0737576698707 44% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0787824433364 0.150856017488 52% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0179532189813 0.0645574589148 28% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 8.0 11.7677419355 68% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 65.73 58.1214874552 113% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.6 10.1575268817 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.27 10.9000537634 85% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.17 8.01818996416 89% => OK
difficult_words: 58.0 86.8835125448 67% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 10.002688172 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 7.6 10.0537634409 76% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.