With the development of society, our living habits have been changed greatly. One of the most significant changes is the issue of whom we young people depend on when making a decision. In the past, young people usually depended on their older family members, especially their parents. However, in contemporary society, we young adults tend to make choice on our own. Here are the reasons.
Admittedly, in the past, the ways they acquired information, most of which come from experience, were limited. It was parents who are much more experienced than their children. In this case, they tended to listen to parents’ advice and let them to control determination. As we all know, over the several decades, parents made the decision for their children who they would marry with in China. At that time, girls had no chance to meet the young men with the same age. However, their parents had the permission to know their children’s future partners through various ways. Without doubt, it was a right choice to depend on their parents when making a decision in the past.
However, we can get access to a great amount of information, which do good to decision making nowadays. Surfing on the internet, clicking on the mouse, news will display on your computer screen within seconds. What’s more, after educating, we have learnt knowledge in a systematic way, which enable us to understand ourselves and the world better. All of these create a good atmosphere for us young people to make decision on ourselves. According to a survey conducted by Peking University aiming to find out how students choose their majors, 80 percent of students depend on their own while less than 20% decided by their parents or teachers instead. Most students are independent nowadays. They would listen to their parents, but it is themselves who determine the final choice.
Another important reason is that some of adults’ experience work less effectively on our generation because conditions change rapidly in the information age. In the past, it was less likely for youngsters to move out of their hometowns while we usually move from one place to another nowadays. So parents’ idea might not fit our situation any more. Consequently, we prefer to make a decision depend on our own experience.
In sum, for the reasons I mentioned above, I totally agree that in contemporary society, we young adults are better able to make choice on our own.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
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Suggestion:
...oice on our own. Here are the reasons. Admittedly, in the past, the ways they a...
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... when making a decision in the past. However, we can get access to a great am...
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Message: Consider replacing "in a systematic way" with adverb for "systematic"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...ter educating, we have learnt knowledge in a systematic way, which enable us to understand ourselve...
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Suggestion:
...lves who determine the final choice. Another important reason is that some of...
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...cision depend on our own experience. In sum, for the reasons I mentioned abov...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, consequently, however, if, second, so, while
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 9.8082437276 51% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 13.8261648746 29% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.0286738351 109% => OK
Pronoun: 48.0 43.0788530466 111% => OK
Preposition: 69.0 52.1666666667 132% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 8.0752688172 124% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2062.0 1977.66487455 104% => OK
No of words: 411.0 407.700716846 101% => OK
Chars per words: 5.01703163017 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.50256981431 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.76170616017 2.67179642975 103% => OK
Unique words: 224.0 212.727598566 105% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.54501216545 0.524837075471 104% => OK
syllable_count: 630.0 618.680645161 102% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 13.0 9.59856630824 135% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 11.0 4.94265232975 223% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.6003584229 117% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 40.4864303399 48.9658058833 83% => OK
Chars per sentence: 85.9166666667 100.406767564 86% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.125 20.6045352989 83% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.04166666667 5.45110844103 37% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 11.8709677419 59% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 13.0 4.88709677419 266% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.365043025084 0.236089414692 155% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.101009433477 0.076458572812 132% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0830833260981 0.0737576698707 113% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.209274509248 0.150856017488 139% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0539356386409 0.0645574589148 84% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.8 11.7677419355 92% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 62.68 58.1214874552 108% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 10.1575268817 86% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.54 10.9000537634 106% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.98 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 91.0 86.8835125448 105% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.0 10.002688172 60% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.