Some people contend that a celebrity's opinion is more important compared to older people's, while others hold the opposite attitude. From my perspective, both opinions of the famous figure and the elders are equally crucial and I will elaborate on my viewpoint in the following paragraphs.
On the one hand, a celebrity's influence is usually accepted by society. The younger generation tends to find a model to imitate, this is because they are starting to organize a lifestyle for themselves. Therefore, a celebrity's opinions are usually broadly accepted, and the reputation around the world is well developed, it is suitable for teenagers to follow. For instance, in early 2020, Oxford University published an investigation about the association between rock music's influence and the generation's thought during 1980. The researcher demonstrated that the values and the thoughts in the lyries had a significant impact on the entire generation which eventually change their activities and lifestyle. As a result, this poofs that a greatly known figure's opinion can bring a lot of difference.
On the other hand, older people tend to have more experience. As a normal individual, an elder's experiences are more likely to be similar to ours, people who had a similar life track to us might be in the same situation before, and their wisdom and experience might be the tool to help us solve the problem. A good example of this point is that after graduating from college, I struggled with finding a job position that match my profession. However, my parents suggested I try some industry that I have not considered before, it might be an opportunity to explore an unexpected journey and it went well. Thus, older people's opinions are valuable to younger people as well.
As far as I'm concerned, they are equally advantageous to us because both of them have lessons that we can take from.
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- TPO 38 integrated writing task 70
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...viewpoint in the following paragraphs. On the one hand, a celebritys influence ...
^^
Line 2, column 724, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
... activities and lifestyle. As a result, this poofs that a greatly known figures opin...
^^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...pinion can bring a lot of difference. On the other hand, older people tend to ...
^^
Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...e valuable to younger people as well. As far as Im concerned, they are equally...
^^
Line 4, column 13, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: I'm
...o younger people as well. As far as Im concerned, they are equally advantageou...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
however, if, so, therefore, thus, well, while, for instance, as a result, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 15.1003584229 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 13.8261648746 65% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 32.0 43.0788530466 74% => OK
Preposition: 38.0 52.1666666667 73% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 8.0752688172 161% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1575.0 1977.66487455 80% => OK
No of words: 312.0 407.700716846 77% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.04807692308 4.8611393121 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.20279927342 4.48103885553 94% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.90045331593 2.67179642975 109% => OK
Unique words: 179.0 212.727598566 84% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.573717948718 0.524837075471 109% => OK
syllable_count: 513.0 618.680645161 83% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.59856630824 73% => OK
Article: 6.0 3.08781362007 194% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 20.6003584229 68% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 48.6277509583 48.9658058833 99% => OK
Chars per sentence: 112.5 100.406767564 112% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.2857142857 20.6045352989 108% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.5 5.45110844103 119% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8709677419 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 3.85842293907 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.184709919535 0.236089414692 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0691806153613 0.076458572812 90% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0750918810803 0.0737576698707 102% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.10206837674 0.150856017488 68% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0616993316044 0.0645574589148 96% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.5 11.7677419355 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 58.1214874552 85% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 10.1575268817 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.31 10.9000537634 113% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.23 8.01818996416 115% => OK
difficult_words: 89.0 86.8835125448 102% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 10.002688172 115% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.