AIDS is a disease that has killed millions of people all over the world. Most of the cases of AIDS in the world are in poorer countries where the people can’t afford to buy the drugs that would help keep them alive and healthy. Many AIDS Advocacy Groups (AAGs) are trying to help the people in these developing countries get the health care they need to fight AIDS. AAGs are doing this in several ways.
First of all, they argue that the profits of these companies are too high and such high pricing is immoral in the face of such a devastating disease. AAGs believe that major drug companies should sell their AIDS medicines at a much lower cost so that AIDS patients who have very little money would not have to choose between buying their food or their medication.
Second, AAGs are trying to get governments to pay for AIDS drugs instead of individual people. In general, when buying in large quantities, the price goes down. Therefore, if a government bought enough medication for all the AIDS patients in its country, then the price per bottle of medication would be much lower than the price individuals currently pay when buying medication on their own.
Third, AAGs are beginning to encourage poor countries to make their own cheap versions of AIDS drugs, even though it is illegal to do so. If the drugs were made in the same country, this would not only reduce shipping costs, but it would also give many people jobs in these poorer countries.
The paragraph and the lecture both talk about the AIDS disease and the steps to be taken to fight it as suggested by the AIDS advocacy groups(AAGs). The passage supports the measures suggested by the AAGs for three specific reasons. The lecturer does not think that these claims hold water and refutes each point.
First and foremost, the author of the passage states that the AAGs suggest that companies manufacturing the AIDS drugs should cut down on their profits and sell them for lower and affordable costs. He adds that in the face of such a outspread of this devastating diseases its immoral for the companies to think of their profits and make people choose between buying medication or food. This does not sit well with the lecturer and he opposes it by contending that drug companies just like any other business need to make profits to survive in the market. He highlights that only if profits are made, investors would invest and only then new drugs can be created. If profits stop then new drug manufacturing also stops.
Another group of scholars represented by the author believe that the governments of the developing countries should buy the medicines in bulk. This, according to them, would lower cost of medicine per bottle as compared to the current cost the citizens pay. The lecturer is quick to point out a flaw with the author's claim. He explains that there is a big economic problem which is overlooked here. The governments of the developing countries are poor just like their citizens. They are unable to afford the medicines for their citizens.
Lastly, the author points that AAGs encourage the developing countries to manufacture their own drugs even though illegal. He thinks that this is a cheaper alternative as it reduces the shipping costs and also provides jobs to its citizens and thus is advantageous. The lecturer strongly disapproves of the authors point. He states that making illegal copies of drugs is stealing and is totally unethical. Additionally he mentions that this might be unsafe for people to consume as in order to save money the quality of the drugs is often tainted. This may lead to people being sick or even worse; death.
Clearly the author and the lecturer are unable to find a common ground.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2021-10-16 | cluelessme | 83 | view |
| 2021-07-06 | reeya kiran | 68 | view |
- integrated writing TPO 7 70
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 232, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...by the AAGs for three specific reasons. The lecturer does not think that these clai...
^^^
Line 3, column 232, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...costs. He adds that in the face of such a outspread of this devastating diseases ...
^
Line 3, column 664, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...and only then new drugs can be created. If profits stop then new drug manufacturin...
^^
Line 6, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ford the medicines for their citizens. Lastly, the author points that AAGs enco...
^^^
Line 7, column 407, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Additionally,
...s is stealing and is totally unethical. Additionally he mentions that this might be unsafe f...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, if, lastly, look, may, so, then, thus, well
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 10.4613686534 153% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 5.04856512141 158% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 7.30242825607 205% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 13.0 12.0772626932 108% => OK
Pronoun: 38.0 22.412803532 170% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 43.0 30.3222958057 142% => OK
Nominalization: 1.0 5.01324503311 20% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1878.0 1373.03311258 137% => OK
No of words: 384.0 270.72406181 142% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.890625 5.08290768461 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.4267276788 4.04702891845 109% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.52963661717 2.5805825403 98% => OK
Unique words: 198.0 145.348785872 136% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.515625 0.540411800872 95% => OK
syllable_count: 562.5 419.366225166 134% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.55342163355 97% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 3.25607064018 246% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 8.0 8.23620309051 97% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 1.25165562914 80% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.51434878587 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 2.5761589404 39% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 13.0662251656 153% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 21.2450331126 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 51.705028769 49.2860985944 105% => OK
Chars per sentence: 93.9 110.228320801 85% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.2 21.698381199 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.8 7.06452816374 40% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.09492273731 122% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 4.19205298013 119% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 4.33554083885 161% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 4.45695364238 202% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.27373068433 94% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.159536183256 0.272083759551 59% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0428514730063 0.0996497079465 43% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.042994064888 0.0662205650399 65% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.079694051058 0.162205337803 49% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0466663834715 0.0443174109184 105% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.2 13.3589403974 84% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 53.8541721854 113% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 5.55761589404 158% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 11.0289183223 86% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.08 12.2367328918 91% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.79 8.42419426049 92% => OK
difficult_words: 78.0 63.6247240618 123% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 10.7273730684 126% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.498013245 91% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.2008830022 89% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 20 minutes.
Rates: 83.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 25.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.