Do you agree or disagree with following statement, It is better for children to choose jobs that are similar to their parent`s job than choose jobs that are very different from their parent`s job?
Although it can be argued that it is better children to choose the same or similar jobs to their parent`s job, I disagree that it is better than doing a major, which is different from their parent`s. Three reasons persuade me to put forward this opinion. First of all, each major needs specific talent and every child and his parent`s talent are differ from each other; moreover, they will not be independent, and finally, their ratio on success in the same job is too lower than their family.
First of all, each jobs needs specific and unique talent, everyone is not able to handle all tasks as well as he can do some specific task. For example, a good teacher cannot be a good painter, although she can deliver all subjects and materials so easily and professional to the students; however, they are not capable to deliver their emotion like a painter, who is talented to express his emotion by paint. Thus, it is impossible a child, who has different skills and talents from his parents to do the same job.
Moreover, as a child chooses the same job, which their parents acquired, they will be dependent to their parents. In this case, family control every process like their child`s educations process or job. For example if the child do the same job with their family, they used to get their parent`s supports for any situation because they tried all this conditions and are master skilled in this job. So, they cannot do anything without their advice, in this condition they totally adapted to their parents and their advice.
Finally, from my point of view children, who do the same jobs with their parent`s jobs are less able to be successful. As they get familiar with these jobs with their family, they lose their interest and children will find it as a routine, in addition, they will not provide creative solution or path for themselves because everything gets ready for them by family. So, in this condition, their fraction in the success is too less in comparison with their parents.
To recap, although it seems a good idea for children to do the same job with their parents, it does not provide that merits, trying it.
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it is better children to choose the same or similar jobs
it is better for children to choose the same or similar jobs
are differ from each other
are different from each other
is too lower than their family.
is much lower than their family.
do some specific task.
do some specific tasks.
it is impossible a child, who has different skills and talents from his parents to do the same job.
it is impossible for a child, who has different skills and talents from his parents to do the same job.
Sentence: First of all, each major needs specific talent and every child and his parents talent are differ from each other; moreover, they will not be independent, and finally, their ratio on success in the same job is too lower than their family.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to parents and talent
Sentence: First of all, each jobs needs specific and unique talent, everyone is not able to handle all tasks as well as he can do some specific task.
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to each and jobs
Sentence: For example, a good teacher cannot be a good painter, although she can deliver all subjects and materials so easily and professional to the students; however, they are not capable to deliver their emotion like a painter, who is talented to express his emotion by paint.
Description: The fragment so easily and is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace easily with adjective
Sentence: In this case, family control every process like their childs educations process or job.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to educations and process
Sentence: For example if the child do the same job with their family, they used to get their parents supports for any situation because they tried all this conditions and are master skilled in this job.
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to this and conditions
Sentence: Finally, from my point of view children, who do the same jobs with their parents jobs are less able to be successful.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to parents and jobs
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 11 2
Read a good grammar book.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 17 in 30
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 11 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 376 350
No. of Characters: 1703 1500
No. of Different Words: 165 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.403 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.529 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.214 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 113 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 88 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 43 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 16 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26.857 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.199 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.714 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.391 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.619 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.144 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5