Claim: Even though young people often receive the advice to “follow your dreams,” more emphasis should be placed on picking worthy goals.
Reason: Many people’s dreams are inherently selfish.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim AND the reason on which that claim is based.
Young, naive people have seldom seen and gone through the experiences of a wise old man.The claim above states that young people when advised to choose about their dreams, should choose a goal which is worthy. The reason behind this being a multitude of them choose a dream which is selfish. Young people tend to be impulsive and always on the go and they may choose a dream which they feel momentarily looks more than perfect, but in the long run may not be that efficacious.
Young people have not seen the ups and downs and have not gone through all the roller coaster of emotions which an experienced man may have.So he may choose a dream to follow which may be ephemeral.Instead he should be advised to choose a dream, a dream which is selfless, which sustains himself and others. Which brings about a change in himself and others for the good.Young people may not have these canny abilities to choose from or may be selfish in choosing a dream, which may give them temporary satisfaction, but to bring them to the correct path of enlightenment they should obviously be guided.
The world has become a place where money stands above humanity. To improve the condition young people have to choose dreams which are selfless. This can only be done if young people are encouraged to choose a dream which they feel they can pursue forward and bring about change in everyone's soul.
Young people may be tempted yo choose a dream which they feel perfect enough but they should be advised and guided to pick up a dream which helps. All the big celebrities and money makers donate their money their hard earned money to philanthropy.They do this because of a inner guilt of not following a dream which could have helped others grow.Instead they followed a dream a selfish dream.
Young people should be advised to choose a a worthy goal but it should not be forced. Because dreams are words which may loose its meaning when pursued by force.If a young lad chooses a dream out of force he may feel disinterested after a while. Which may do more harm than good.
To conclude young people should be given a freedom to choose a goal and if one feels it is not worthy enough, he can be counselled and make him understand the advantages of choosing a worthier goal.
Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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2016-02-20 | davidjang7 | 70 | view |
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Comments
May I know why the less
May I know why the less rating? How can I improve ?
Thanks
Need more different words,
Need more different words, look:
No. of Words: 410 while No. of Different Words: 174
Average Word Length: 4.439 4.6
it mean there are a lot of duplicated words. So keep in mind don't develop sentences like the sentences in our daily spoken English. Sentences need to be polished.
flaws:
No. of Words: 410 while No. of Different Words: 174
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 410 350
No. of Characters: 1820 1500
No. of Different Words: 174 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.5 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.439 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.264 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 118 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 58 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 32 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 22 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 29.286 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 14.83 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.643 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.463 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.696 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.229 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5