Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Children should begin learning a foreign language as soon as they start school. Use specific reasons and examples to support your position.

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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Children should begin learning a foreign language as soon as they start school. Use specific reasons and examples to support your position.

The education of our children has always been one of the greatest concerns among our society. Proper education can guarantee them to have the ability of facing the challenges and opportunities in the future. Some people might hold the view that it is unnecessary to let children start learning a foreign language as soon as they start school; others would disagree. In my view, it is necessary for two important reasons.

the main reason is that it exercise children's brains. Learning languages is a relatively hard work. It requires memorizing large amount of information such as words, phrases, and grammar rules. So it challenging for children brains to handle the task but it is a great way to exercise their brains. For example, I have been learning English for years ever since my junior high school. At first I didn't like it at all, because all the grammar rules and words were just too complicated for me. So it was not surprising I got lowest grades for English among all other subjects in an exam. After that I realized that I was simply so afraid of learning it that I tried to escape from it instead of putting my efforts to it. So after I studied hard in learning English, I score got a lot better. And I also found that my memory has also improved which also benefited me in learning other subjects such as maths. I was able to remember math equations much after than before. From that experience I learnt that learning a language can exercise our minds.

Another reason is that it provides more opportunities for children when they grow up. Only knowing your mother tongue means you can only find jobs or live and know people from you mother countries, while knowing several languages can present you with much more chances because you can move around different nations without any problem in daily life. For example, I have a brother who knows 3 languages because he loves learning languages when he was in university. After graduation he found a jobs in a English-speaking company in shanghai without too much difficulty because of his English ability and good education. But after a while he quit the job and decided to continue studying as a graduate student in Japan because his Japanese is also quite good. As you can see, being able to speak several languages gives his much more opportunities compared with average Chinese students.

In a nutshell, it is necessary for young children to study foreign languages. Not only it exercise your brains but also it gives you more possibilities to your life.

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2018-04-20 rahul chauhan 73 view
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Sentence: the main reason is that it exercise children's brains.
Description: The fragment it exercise children's is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace exercise with verb, past tense

So it challenging for children brains
So it is challenging for children's brains

Not only it exercise your brains but also it gives you more possibilities to your life.
Description: 'Not only...but also' is not used properly. can you re-write this sentence?

I got lowest grades
I got the lowest grades

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2

More sentences varieties wanted. Try to use less pronouns (like 'It, I, They, We, You...') as the subject of a sentence. for example:

After that
I realized that
I was simply so afraid of learning it that
I tried to escape from it instead of putting my efforts to it. So after
I studied hard in learning English,
I score got a lot better. And
I also found that my memory has also improved which also benefited me in learning other subjects such as maths.
I was able to remember math equations much after than before.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 22 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 24 15
No. of Words: 439 350
No. of Characters: 2048 1500
No. of Different Words: 225 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.577 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.665 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.593 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 144 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 113 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 72 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 35 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.292 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.646 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.542 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.288 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.452 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.126 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5